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Unger Games

McGill Cuts Beloved Crokinole Team

November 28, 2025

MONTREAL, QC McGill University has freed up more than $6 billion in budget space after cutting the beloved but expensive crokinole team. “Players kept flicking the pieces all over the place and losing them,” said […]

Unger Suspicion

Mennonites Demand Release of the Epsteinbach Files

November 27, 2025

STEINBACH, MB After many years of uncertainty and protest, the Epsteinbach files will finally be released this spring. “Oba, that Elder Thiessen is delaying things,” said Epsteinbach enthusiast Laura Koop. “I’m like, if he has […]

Unger Conviction

  • It’s Official: Steinbach Now Has More Churches than People
    September 24, 2018
  • Meet the ‘Steinbach Reads’ 2022 Contenders: Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John
    April 25, 2022
  • Mennonite Pastors Make Statement With ‘Pay Us What You Owe Us’ T-Shirts
    July 25, 2025

Unger & Thirst

  • Local Baker Has Long List of People He Refuses to Bake Cakes For
    June 5, 2018
  • Shoplifter Donates Robin Hood Flour to the Poor
    December 3, 2020
  • “Buying Crackers is For Suckers!” Claims Mennonite Woman
    November 19, 2019

Unger the Influence

  • A Complete List of Jokes that Won’t Get You Cancelled These Days
    September 18, 2025
  • Carney Enlists the Amish to Address Canada’s Housing Crisis
    September 14, 2025
  • Doug Ford Dumps Out Entire Crown Royal Bag Full of Scrabble Tiles
    September 3, 2025

The Daily Bonnet

  • Why that Mennonite Boy is Not Texting You Back
    May 9, 2018
  • House Fails to Warm Up After Mennonite Man Puts on the Fireplace Channel
    January 14, 2024
  • Cruisers to Have Exclusive Access to Steinbach Main Street on Friday Nights
    May 5, 2017
  • Real News or Satire: 2024 Unger Review Quiz
    December 25, 2024

Trending

  • Winnipeg Couple Embark on Arduous High-Altitude Expedition to Second Balcony of Burton Cummings Theatre
    November 20, 2025
  • Dating Couple to Spend Romantic Evening Basking in the Aroma of the Maple Leaf Plant
    November 18, 2025
  • Mennonite Families Sign-Up to Bring Salads, Buns, and Measles to Upcoming Potluck
    November 17, 2025
  • Winnipeg Man to Host Grey Cup Party and Cheer for Nobody
    November 16, 2025

Unger Suspicion

  • Conspiracy Nut Launches Rocket to Prove Steinbach is Flat
    December 4, 2017
  • Tucker Carlson Discovered Knacking Zoat in Jeans Shorts at the Pits
    April 25, 2023
  • New ‘Chief Medical Officer’ Trading Cards are Flying Off the Shelves
    April 16, 2020
  • Lonely White Male Spends Romantic Evening Alone Watching Ben Shapiro Videos
    February 14, 2018
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Lack of Snow Deludes Winnipeg Man Into Thinking He Doesn’t Need a Parka

November 26, 2025

Local Dad Gets Full Time Job Carting His Kids Around to Sports

November 25, 2025

Chaos Erupts in Church After Pastor Calls for Hymn 67

November 23, 2025

Mennonite Man Opens Southern Manitoba’s Largest Aura Farm

November 22, 2025

Mennonite Woman Concerned She Might Be Anglican

November 21, 2025

Unger Games

  • McGill Cuts Beloved Crokinole Team
    November 28, 2025
  • Local Dad Gets Full Time Job Carting His Kids Around to Sports
    November 25, 2025
  • Winnipeg Man to Host Grey Cup Party and Cheer for Nobody
    November 16, 2025
  • 20-Knipser Pileup Just Outside Blumenort
    November 9, 2025
  • Lodged Perogy Costs Blue Jays World Series
    November 2, 2025

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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