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Unger Suspicion

Angine de Poitrine Turn Out to be a Couple Mennonite Boys from Winkler

April 15, 2026

WINKLER, MB Angine de Poitrine, the mysterious math rock duo who has taken the Internet by storm, have kept their identities secret until now. The secret slipped this week out after the drummer was caught […]

Unger the Influence

Conservatives Form Majority Government

April 14, 2026

OTTAWA, ON After a barrage of floor crossing and a couple by-elections this week, Mark Carney and the Conservative Party of Canada have finally formed a majority government. “Canadians have spoken loud and clear—they want […]

Unger Conviction

  • ‘Praise God From Whom All Blessings Flow’ Reaches #1 on iTunes Chart Nearly 5 Centuries After its Release
    February 6, 2024
  • Mennonite Church’s Shocking Peace Plan Revealed in Group Chat
    March 26, 2025
  • Abbotsford Man Has No Excuse to Miss Church Tomorrow Since He’ll Be Up at 5 AM Anyway Watching Hockey
    February 21, 2026

Unger & Thirst

  • No Tüte for Naughty Uncle Corny This Year
    December 26, 2018
  • Mennonite Man Keeps Fork, Dessert Doesn’t Come
    June 5, 2018
  • Mennonites Eager to Try New ‘Beyond Formavorscht’ Burger
    June 21, 2019

Unger the Influence

  • White House Demands New Bridge Be Rerouted to Epstein Island
    February 11, 2026
  • George Washington Completely “Absolved” in New Epstein Files
    February 1, 2026
  • Premiers Gather in Saskatoon for Annual Crokinole Tournament
    January 29, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Sloth Emerges Victorious in Mennonite Dance Competition
    June 20, 2016
  • Area Cyclists Shocked By the Presence of Pedestrians on the Sidewalk
    July 21, 2016
  • High Valley Fills Winnipeg Theatre Entirely with Rempels
    March 5, 2026
  • Manitoba’s Most Progressive Mennonite Man Moves His Clock Forward an Hour
    March 10, 2019

Trending

  • Mennonite Man Sent To Unclog Space Toilet
    April 7, 2026
  • Family Manages to Get On a Record Three Rides During Weeklong Trip to Disney
    April 6, 2026
  • Taber Arena Will No Longer Be Flooded With Schmaunt Fat After Winning Kraft Hockeyville
    April 5, 2026
  • Peters “Makes It to First Base” Giving Hope to Young Men Across Winkler
    April 4, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Goat Wins Top Prize in Annual Cuteness Awards
    July 1, 2025
  • 16-Year-Old Swede Tops Canadian Election Poll
    September 24, 2019
  • Avid Outdoorsman Spends All Day Indoors Wearing Bass Pro Shops Cap
    August 17, 2023
  • Metalheads Accidentally Attend Beth Moore Event
    December 3, 2022
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“I thought it was me as a trajchtmoaka,” Trump says

April 13, 2026

Mennonite Man Wears His Very Best Carhartt to Church

April 12, 2026

Americans Demand the Flooding of Saskatchewan and Manitoba to Give their Ships Easier Access to Canadian Oil

April 11, 2026

Thousands of Poultry Farmers Accidentally Show Up at ‘National Poetry Month’ Event

April 10, 2026

Killing People Only Way to Achieve Lasting Peace, Leaders Insist

April 8, 2026

Unger Games

  • Taber Arena Will No Longer Be Flooded With Schmaunt Fat After Winning Kraft Hockeyville
    April 5, 2026
  • Peters “Makes It to First Base” Giving Hope to Young Men Across Winkler
    April 4, 2026
  • Jason Kelce Spotted on Manitoba Farm in Full Mennonite Attire
    March 11, 2026
  • American Victory Part of Chinese Government Plot to Get Canadians to Quit Playing Hockey
    February 26, 2026
  • Trump to Award Connor Helleybuyck Nation’s Highest Honour: The Undisputed Champion of Beautiful Clean Coal
    February 25, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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