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Unger Games

Peters “Makes It to First Base” Giving Hope to Young Men Across Winkler

April 4, 2026

WINKLER, MB Rumours are swirling in Winkler this week after Chicago White Sox outfielder Tristan Peters became the first Mennonite ever and first Manitoban in almost twenty years to make to first base. The news […]

Unger Suspicion

Pam Bondi Offered Promising New Career in Multilevel Marketing

April 3, 2026

WASHINGTON, DC It didn’t take long for recently unemployed Attorney General Pam Bondi to land on her feet. “The church ladies have always got your back,” said Bondi. “Everyone was coming up to me in […]

Unger Conviction

  • 9 Pound Mennonite Baby Miraculously Born Three Months Premature
    August 4, 2016
  • Mennonite Man Suspended from Church for the Next 4 Sundays
    June 4, 2021
  • Revolutionary New Mennonite Church Adds an Extra Two Ounces to Baptismal Water
    July 9, 2018

Unger & Thirst

  • Mennonite Man Impresses Many With His Ability to Open Stubborn Pickle Jars
    September 12, 2016
  • Winkler Man Caught at Morden Bar
    May 1, 2017
  • Zwieback Added to Periodic Table of Elements
    November 4, 2018

Unger the Influence

  • Premiers Gather in Saskatoon for Annual Crokinole Tournament
    January 29, 2026
  • “Up is Down” and “Down is Up” New Report Suggests
    January 26, 2026
  • GTA Prepares for Largest Deposit of Snow Since the Rob Ford Administration
    January 25, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Dodge Caravan Sets World Land Speed Record
    August 13, 2017
  • Introducing Every Mennonite’s New Favourite Winter Pastime: Strip Knipsbrat
    November 9, 2018
  • 7 Mennonite Sisters Marry 7 Mennonite Brothers in Epic Septuple Wedding
    October 30, 2017
  • Mennonite Woman Refunded Tuition After Graduating Bible School Single
    May 7, 2021

Trending

  • Mennonite Church Shuns Snowman For Being ‘Immodestly Dressed’
    March 27, 2026
  • Mennonite Man Cancels Netflix Over Lack of Fishing Shows
    March 25, 2026
  • Manitoba to Remove PST on Honey Dill Sauce, Premier Says
    March 24, 2026
  • ‘KPop Dueck Hunters’ Number One Movie on Mennonite Netflix
    March 23, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Sporadic Golfer Still Can’t Figure Out Why He Sucks At It
    July 9, 2017
  • Communist Takeover Complete After Local Man is Politely Asked to Put on a Mask
    November 20, 2020
  • Rogers Demands Sincere-Looking Half-Hearted Apology from Don Cherry
    November 12, 2019
  • Mennonite Man Violently Tossed From Airplane in Midflight
    April 15, 2017
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Mennonite Children Excited for Annual Paska Bun Hunt

April 2, 2026

8 Mennonite Families from Mexico Establish New Colony on Moon

April 1, 2026

Spring Arrives in Manitoba

March 31, 2026

La Crete Couple Spends Wild Weekend in High Level

March 30, 2026

Winnipeg Construction Crews Busy Installing Fresh New Potholes

March 29, 2026

Unger Games

  • Peters “Makes It to First Base” Giving Hope to Young Men Across Winkler
    April 4, 2026
  • Jason Kelce Spotted on Manitoba Farm in Full Mennonite Attire
    March 11, 2026
  • American Victory Part of Chinese Government Plot to Get Canadians to Quit Playing Hockey
    February 26, 2026
  • Trump to Award Connor Helleybuyck Nation’s Highest Honour: The Undisputed Champion of Beautiful Clean Coal
    February 25, 2026
  • Carney to Melt Down All of Canada’s Unwanted Olympic Medals to Build High Speed Rail Line
    February 24, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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