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Unger Suspicion

Minnesota to be Renamed ‘Manitoba South’

February 3, 2026

ST. PAUL, MINNESOTA The state of Minnesota, famed for its lakes, cheese-stuffed hamburgers and association with the late musician Prince, has decided to forego all that and take on the new name ‘Manitoba South.’ “People […]

Unger the Influence

George Washington Completely “Absolved” in New Epstein Files

February 1, 2026

WASHINGTON, DC Historians are breathing a sigh of relief this weekend as not a single mention of George Washington was discovered in the latest batch of Epstein files. “His name has been completely cleared,” said […]

Unger Conviction

  • Mennonite Man Wears Steel Toe Boots to Church
    December 19, 2022
  • Millennial Puts on Her Nicest Ripped Jeans for Church this Sunday
    January 28, 2018
  • Pastor Drops Five Infants During Last Sunday’s Child Dedication Service
    June 3, 2016

Unger & Thirst

  • Mennonite Farmer Sausage Recipe Calls for 30 to 50 Feral Hogs
    August 7, 2019
  • MennoCon23 Attendee Caught Skipping Session to Get BBQ
    July 5, 2023
  • Mennonite Man Embarks on New Career After a Weekend of Gorging on Oma’s Cooking
    April 2, 2018

Unger the Influence

  • Ottawa Disappointed with Gun Buyback Program in Mennonite Country
    January 11, 2026
  • Zwaagstra Vows to Continue Goertzen’s Legacy of Giving Andrew Unger Plenty of Material
    January 8, 2026
  • US Troops Accidentally Seize One of Those Oil and Vinegar Tasting Rooms
    January 5, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Andrew Unger Slowly Becoming Rudy Wiebe
    April 9, 2022
  • Retired ‘Main Street Cruiser’ to Become ‘Sunday Driver’
    October 23, 2017
  • Mixup at Family Gathering Has Mr. Penner Knipsing for a Triple Word Score
    October 10, 2020
  • Jeff Bezos Commits to Sending All Funks into Space
    July 23, 2021

Trending

  • GTA Prepares for Largest Deposit of Snow Since the Rob Ford Administration
    January 25, 2026
  • Every American School to be Supplied with their Very Own Dairy Cow
    January 24, 2026
  • Mennonite Man Gets Standing Ovation in Switzerland
    January 22, 2026
  • Andrew Unger Gifted Secondhand Nobel Prize for Literature
    January 21, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Regina and Saskatoon Merge to Attract IKEA and a Hockey Team
    January 16, 2023
  • Lisa LaFlamme Offered Job at The Daily Bonnet
    August 17, 2022
  • A Do-it-Yourselfers Guide to Selecting and Constructing the Perfect Border Wall
    March 22, 2018
  • Mennonite Olympic Dominance, as Explained By Dr. Freud
    August 19, 2016
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Theatres Empty for New Documentary About My Taunte Lina

January 31, 2026

Premiers Gather in Saskatoon for Annual Crokinole Tournament

January 29, 2026

Area Man to Pretend Super Bowl Actually Matters to Distract Himself from Everything Else Going On in the World Right Now

January 28, 2026

Climber Scales Credit Union Building Without Safety Gear

January 27, 2026

“Up is Down” and “Down is Up” New Report Suggests

January 26, 2026

Unger Games

  • Premiers Gather in Saskatoon for Annual Crokinole Tournament
    January 29, 2026
  • Area Man to Pretend Super Bowl Actually Matters to Distract Himself from Everything Else Going On in the World Right Now
    January 28, 2026
  • Winnipeg Jets Sign Mennonite Senior to Bring Some Youth to the Team
    January 19, 2026
  • New Season of ‘Heated Rivalry’ to Feature Manitoba’s Top Crokinole Players
    January 17, 2026
  • Steinbach Mayor Wins Grand Slam of Butchering
    January 12, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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