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Unger the Influence

Mennonite Beats Mennonite with Votes from Mennonites

October 25, 2026

VICTORIA, BC Two folks of Mennonite ancestry, Doerkson and Eby, squared off for the role of Premier of British Columbia last night, with Mennonites turning out in droves to support the Mennonite of their choice. […]

Unger the Influence

Winnipeg Mayoral Candidate Accidentally Uses Pictures of Winkler

October 23, 2026

WINNIPEG, MB Winnipeg mayoral candidate Calvin Kleinsasser had a lot of explaining to do this week after his team accidentally ran an ad that included photos of Winkler, Manitoba instead of Winnipeg. “I don’t know […]

Unger Conviction

  • Friesen Family Musical Ensemble Breaks Up
    November 26, 2018
  • United Church Totally Rips Off Mennonite Hymnal
    June 19, 2024
  • They’ve Totally Changed All the Lyrics to 606
    February 17, 2025

Unger & Thirst

  • No Tüte for Naughty Uncle Corny This Year
    December 26, 2018
  • Silly Americans Don’t Even Realize it’s Thanksgiving
    October 12, 2025
  • Mennonites 67 and Older Now Eligible for Schmaunt Fat Injections
    March 22, 2021

Unger the Influence

  • Pentagon Introduces New “Firing Squad” Video Game for Kids
    October 10, 2026
  • British Columbians Can’t Decide Which Mennonite to Vote For
    October 6, 2026
  • Trump Promises Mennonites $5000 Worth of Bubbat if They Vote Republican
    October 3, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Mennonite Karen Accidentally Wears Mask Up Over Her Nose
    July 16, 2021
  • Mennonite Man Discovers Farmer’s Tan in His Plumber’s Crack
    August 4, 2019
  • Mennonite Woman Still Writing Her Cheques for 2018
    January 13, 2019
  • Committee Already Planning “Anabaptism 1000” Celebrations
    June 3, 2025

Trending

  • Incoherent White House Press Secretary Actually Speaking Low German
    October 16, 2026
  • American School Bans ‘The Handmaid’s Tale’ For Being Canadian
    October 14, 2026
  • White House Reinstates Day to Honour Guy Who Directed ‘Home Alone’
    October 13, 2026
  • Mennonite Woman Arrested for Buying Her Pumpkin Pie at Costco
    October 12, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Local Man So Bored He’d Even Be Willing to Watch Baseball
    March 23, 2020
  • Trudeau Insists Kill-Shot is ‘Merely a Flesh Wound’
    June 27, 2017
  • Local Woman Spends All Afternoon Stuck in Line Behind Some Guy Buying Lotto Tickets
    August 17, 2020
  • Mennonite Man Insists His Beard is Not a Tribute to Fidel Castro
    November 26, 2016
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Edmonton Mennonites Big Fans of Mayor Knack-Zoat

October 22, 2026

Roundup Introduces New Product to Eliminate Election Signs in Your Yard

October 21, 2026

Mennonite Church’s Annual ‘Costume and Candy Party’ Eerily Similar to Halloween

October 19, 2026

Mennonites Encouraged to Get Out and Vogt

October 18, 2026

Alberta Separatists Hire Mennonites to Show Them How It’s Done

October 17, 2026

Unger Games

  • Connor Hellebuyck Leads League With Impressive 0.00 GAA So Far This Season
    October 5, 2026
  • Entire Population of Winnipeg Asks for Trade Out of Winnipeg
    September 24, 2026
  • Hellebuyck Demands Chance to Shit the Bed in the Playoffs for Another Team
    September 15, 2026
  • Riders Get Called For ‘Too Many Mennonites’
    September 13, 2026
  • Connor Hellebuyck Demands Trade to Blumenort Menno Knights
    September 1, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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