The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

Unger Games

Unger Games

Limited Edition Dutch Blitz Set to Come Prepackaged with First Aid Kit

January 30, 2023 Andrew

HARRISONBURG, VA A new limited run of special Dutch Blitz sets will come prepackaged with bandages, sterile dressings, gauze, and antiseptic wipes. “It’s about time my Dutch Blitz cards came with a first aid kit,” […]

Unger Games

Winnipeg Jets Trade for the Wrong Toews

January 23, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Rumours have been swirling for weeks that Chicago Blackhawks superstar Jonathan Toews might be on the trading block, and what better place for him to land than in his hometown of Winnipeg. Unfortunately […]

Unger Games

Winnipeg Man Hospitalized After Dangerous Fall from Jets’ Bandwagon

January 20, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Area man Paul Kroeker, 51, was rushed to the hospital last night after a dangerous fall off the Winnipeg Jets’ bandwagon. “Jets suck! Fire Hellebuyck! Jets suck!” yelled Kroeker, as paramedics loaded him […]

Unger Games

Mennonite Woman Discovered Hidden Behind Her Englisher Husband’s Surname

January 8, 2023 Andrew

HOCHSTEIN, MB When Sarah Smith, 27, moved to Hochstein from the city this year to run the coffee shop, locals were immediately impressed by the “authentic Englisher” they now had living in their midst. “Smith […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Blames Loss on Slightly-Raised Staple

January 2, 2023 Andrew

ROSETOWN, MB Area man Steve Kroeker, 67, of Rosetown went home really grumpy after the annual Kroeker Kjnipsdesh tournament this weekend … and all on account of a raised staple. “That’s the last time we […]

Posts navigation

1 2 … 41 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • General Conference and Mennonite Brethren Form Joint Olympic Team
    February 9, 2018
  • Mennonite Woman Still Writing Her Cheques for 2018
    January 13, 2019
  • Missing CMU Student Discovered Beneath a Mountain of Hauerwas Books
    April 4, 2017
  • Mennonites Invade Giant Tiger for Farmer Sausage Sale
    January 5, 2023
  • Alt-Right Protestors Demand the Erection of Steve Bannon Statue
    August 18, 2017

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2023 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved