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Unger the Influence

James Comey Indicted Over ‘606 47’ Seashell Photo

May 3, 2026

WASHINGTON, DC Former FBI director James Comey was indicted this week after posting a photo of seashells that had been arranged to spell ‘606 47.’ “You know what that means?” said President Trump. “Quite frankly […]

Unger the Influence

Hog Farmers Concerned as Manitoba Seeks to Ban AI

May 2, 2026

NEW BOTHWELL, MB Mr. Plett is up in arms this week after Premier Wab Kinew announced plans to ban AI. “What do they expect us to do?” said Plett. “Been so long since I’ve done […]

Unger Conviction

  • Two Groups That Absolutely Hate Each Other and Disagree on Nearly Everything Both Say They’re “Christians”
    September 16, 2022
  • North Kildonan Gets its Own Area Code
    March 22, 2022
  • Visitor to Mennonite Church Blinded By All the Blond Hair
    November 3, 2017

Unger & Thirst

  • Glass at Edge of Table Patiently Awaits Refill
    October 17, 2021
  • 10 Hottest Mennonite Spices Ranked in Order of Spiciness
    February 10, 2024
  • Court Rules that Mennonites Are Allowed to Keep Their Masks on in the Liquor Store
    October 15, 2016

Unger the Influence

  • Funk and Penner Endorse Penner for Goertzen’s Job Reports Peters from Reimer
    March 1, 2026
  • US Launches Major Attack on the Epstein Files
    February 28, 2026
  • James Talarico Article Pulled from the Unger Review
    February 19, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Mennonite Career Fair Offers Two Options: Preacher or Farmer
    January 27, 2021
  • Funk and Reimer Team Up on New Pop Album
    September 2, 2019
  • Astronauts Return to Earth After 9 Months Trapped in Conversation at Mennonite Couple’s Doorway
    March 18, 2025
  • Sod Huts Make a Comeback after Surge in Lumber Prices
    May 20, 2021

Trending

  • Morden Man Sets Up Corn Stand Early This Year
    April 24, 2026
  • Mr. Hamm to Return to Ancestral Name of Mr. Schinkjefleisch
    April 23, 2026
  • Mr. Harms Promises He Won’t Hurt Anybody
    April 22, 2026
  • City of Steinbach Issues ‘Boil Schmaunt Fat’ Advisory
    April 21, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • 2018 FIFA Mennonite World Cup Rankings
    June 14, 2018
  • Approaching Cop Car Turns Out to Be Just a Guy with a Ski Rack
    October 23, 2025
  • Taco Bell Purchases John Coltrane Catalogue for $200 Million
    July 13, 2022
  • Mennonite Olympic Dominance, as Explained By Dr. Freud
    August 19, 2016
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Mennonite Woman’s Algorithm Nothing But Vereniki

May 1, 2026

King Charles: “White House Dinner Not as Delicious as the Vereniki I Had in Steinbach Back in 1970”

April 30, 2026

Cuauhtémoc Selected as 2026 World Cup Host City

April 29, 2026

Mennonite Man Takes Home Top Prize at Annual ‘Humility Awards’

April 27, 2026

Mennonite Town Implements Needle Exchange Program for Knitting-Addicted Grandmas

April 25, 2026

Unger Games

  • Taber Arena Will No Longer Be Flooded With Schmaunt Fat After Winning Kraft Hockeyville
    April 5, 2026
  • Peters “Makes It to First Base” Giving Hope to Young Men Across Winkler
    April 4, 2026
  • Jason Kelce Spotted on Manitoba Farm in Full Mennonite Attire
    March 11, 2026
  • American Victory Part of Chinese Government Plot to Get Canadians to Quit Playing Hockey
    February 26, 2026
  • Trump to Award Connor Helleybuyck Nation’s Highest Honour: The Undisputed Champion of Beautiful Clean Coal
    February 25, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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