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Unger Suspicion

Killing People Only Way to Achieve Lasting Peace, Leaders Insist

April 8, 2026

WASHINGTON, DC It seems the so-called ceasefire in the Middle East lasted oh, about, three minutes, which world leaders claim is actually really good and just part of the plan. “The only way to achieve […]

Unger Suspicion

Mennonite Man Sent To Unclog Space Toilet

April 7, 2026

SPACE Mr. Dave Thiessen, amateur plumber from Plum Coulee, has been sent into space this week to unclog the Artemis II toilet. “When my Mary saw that on TV she said, ‘oba, Dave, that’s a […]

Unger Conviction

  • Mennonite Man Can’t Remember Where He Parked His Winter Coat
    January 15, 2023
  • Mennonite Church Choir Reveals New Third Jersey
    September 16, 2018
  • North Kildonan Gets its Own Area Code
    March 22, 2022

Unger & Thirst

  • Pigeon With Backpack Full of Knackzoat Caught at BC Prison
    January 10, 2023
  • Thieves Steal ‘Mennonite Crown Jewels’ in Brazen Daytime Heist
    October 20, 2025
  • Mennonite Man Woos Potential Spouse by Eating Takis Fuego
    February 14, 2024

Unger the Influence

  • Premiers Gather in Saskatoon for Annual Crokinole Tournament
    January 29, 2026
  • “Up is Down” and “Down is Up” New Report Suggests
    January 26, 2026
  • GTA Prepares for Largest Deposit of Snow Since the Rob Ford Administration
    January 25, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • St. Catharines, Ontario to be Renamed Taunte Katherine’s
    February 24, 2021
  • Cairn to Honour Steinbach’s Founder St. Einbach
    September 3, 2018
  • Gambler Wins Big By Betting on Mennonite UFC Fighter
    September 2, 2020
  • Friesen Population Set to Pass 8 Billion ‘Any Day Now’
    August 18, 2022

Trending

  • 8 Mennonite Families from Mexico Establish New Colony on Moon
    April 1, 2026
  • Spring Arrives in Manitoba
    March 31, 2026
  • La Crete Couple Spends Wild Weekend in High Level
    March 30, 2026
  • Winnipeg Construction Crews Busy Installing Fresh New Potholes
    March 29, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Taylor Swift is Unrecognizable in Music Video for ‘The Menno’
    February 28, 2020
  • Trudeau Grows Authentic Menno Beard
    January 18, 2020
  • Vacationing Couple to Spend the Next Two Weeks Standing in Lines All Over Europe
    August 5, 2024
  • Local Grow-ops Switch to Making Hand Sanitizer
    April 3, 2020
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Family Manages to Get On a Record Three Rides During Weeklong Trip to Disney

April 6, 2026

Taber Arena Will No Longer Be Flooded With Schmaunt Fat After Winning Kraft Hockeyville

April 5, 2026

Peters “Makes It to First Base” Giving Hope to Young Men Across Winkler

April 4, 2026

Pam Bondi Offered Promising New Career in Multilevel Marketing

April 3, 2026

Mennonite Children Excited for Annual Paska Bun Hunt

April 2, 2026

Unger Games

  • Taber Arena Will No Longer Be Flooded With Schmaunt Fat After Winning Kraft Hockeyville
    April 5, 2026
  • Peters “Makes It to First Base” Giving Hope to Young Men Across Winkler
    April 4, 2026
  • Jason Kelce Spotted on Manitoba Farm in Full Mennonite Attire
    March 11, 2026
  • American Victory Part of Chinese Government Plot to Get Canadians to Quit Playing Hockey
    February 26, 2026
  • Trump to Award Connor Helleybuyck Nation’s Highest Honour: The Undisputed Champion of Beautiful Clean Coal
    February 25, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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