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The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man with Million-dollar Tractor Stakes a Stand Against “Pride”

June 13, 2026

WINKLER, MB With Pembina Valley Pride hosting their first ever rally in Winkler this afternoon, some locals are upset, saying that even the name of the organization is a problem. “I mean, people can live […]

Unger Games

Conflict-Averse Mennonites Getting Really Into Soccer to Watch All the Ties

June 12, 2026

TORONTO, ON Thousands of Mennonites across Canada were relieved this afternoon after Canada ended their match with Croatia in a tie. “That way no one goes home happy,” said Pete Dyck of Kitchener. “You know, […]

Unger Conviction

  • Mannequin Challenge or…Mennonite Worship Service?
    November 20, 2016
  • “People just keep coming forward”: ‘Just As I Am’ Played Continuously Since 1967
    November 10, 2020
  • Doily Proven to Be Authentic ‘Shroud of Menno Simons’
    August 24, 2024

Unger & Thirst

  • Hipsters Flock to Rural Manitoba to Take Selfies with Knackzoat
    August 8, 2018
  • Mennonite Grandma Can Finally Sleep Tonight Because She Didn’t Run Out of Food at the Gathering
    August 19, 2021
  • A Daily Bonnet Travel Guide to Manitoba Mennonite Country
    June 15, 2017

Unger the Influence

  • James Comey Indicted Over ‘606 47’ Seashell Photo
    May 3, 2026
  • Hog Farmers Concerned as Manitoba Seeks to Ban AI
    May 2, 2026
  • Doug Ford to Exclusively Travel by Horse and Buggy from Now On
    April 19, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Mennonite Man Assembles Every Single Piece of Furniture in His Entire House with Just this One Allen Key
    May 5, 2020
  • Altona Man Begins Christmas Shopping Early This Year
    December 23, 2016
  • Clingy Mennonite Aunt Making Tally of All the Hugs You’ll Owe Her When This is Over
    April 5, 2020
  • Petro-Canada Introduces New Farmer Sausage-Scented Air Fresheners
    May 26, 2026

Trending

  • Mennonite Man Installs New Inground Pool
    June 4, 2026
  • Adventurous Manitoban Drives Right to the Top of Province’s Highest Mountain
    June 3, 2026
  • Mennonite Woman Creates Her Own Rhubarb-Flavoured Bubly
    June 2, 2026
  • Trump Calls Andrew Unger “Untalented, Totally Not Funny,” Demands Cancellation of The Unger Review
    May 31, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Local Paper Candidate Asking for Your Vote on Monday
    October 20, 2019
  • New Card Game ‘German Blitz’ Fails to Catch On
    November 30, 2022
  • Trudeau Really Hoping ‘Everyone Is Way Too High to Notice Scandal’
    February 28, 2019
  • Jason Aldean Releases Controversial New Song “Try That In A Small Mennonite Town”
    July 22, 2023
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Every Self-Respecting Mennonite Cheering for Paraguay in World Cup Opener Friday

June 11, 2026

Ottawa to Ban Social Media for Kids and Replace it with Hinterland Who’s Who

June 10, 2026

Mennonite Man Super Excited to Eat These Noah’s Ark Cookies

June 9, 2026

Mennonite Church to Host UFC Fight

June 7, 2026

Road Crews Really Busy This Summer Putting Out Pylons

June 6, 2026

Unger Games

  • Conflict-Averse Mennonites Getting Really Into Soccer to Watch All the Ties
    June 12, 2026
  • Every Self-Respecting Mennonite Cheering for Paraguay in World Cup Opener Friday
    June 11, 2026
  • Mennonite Church to Host UFC Fight
    June 7, 2026
  • Enhanced Games Allow Athletes to Use Summa Borscht
    May 28, 2026
  • Winnipeg Metro Region Hoists Centennial Cup
    May 18, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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