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Unger Suspicion

Minnesota to be Renamed ‘Manitoba South’

February 3, 2026

ST. PAUL, MINNESOTA The state of Minnesota, famed for its lakes, cheese-stuffed hamburgers and association with the late musician Prince, has decided to forego all that and take on the new name ‘Manitoba South.’ “People […]

Unger the Influence

George Washington Completely “Absolved” in New Epstein Files

February 1, 2026

WASHINGTON, DC Historians are breathing a sigh of relief this weekend as not a single mention of George Washington was discovered in the latest batch of Epstein files. “His name has been completely cleared,” said […]

Unger Conviction

  • Faith Healer Offers Monthly Payment Plan
    January 10, 2025
  • Mennonite Woman Accidentally Reads Men’s Study Bible
    September 24, 2022
  • Churches Demand All National Parks Be Turned Into Bible Camps
    January 20, 2018

Unger & Thirst

  • Descendants of Penner Foods Employees to Gather in Steinbach
    May 28, 2016
  • Mennonite Man Brings Inferior Zoat to Bonfire
    May 31, 2020
  • Mennonite-Grown Pumpkins Must Be Used For Pie Not Jack O’Lanterns
    October 12, 2024

Unger the Influence

  • Ottawa Disappointed with Gun Buyback Program in Mennonite Country
    January 11, 2026
  • Zwaagstra Vows to Continue Goertzen’s Legacy of Giving Andrew Unger Plenty of Material
    January 8, 2026
  • US Troops Accidentally Seize One of Those Oil and Vinegar Tasting Rooms
    January 5, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Winkler Man Racks Up $5 Million in Roaming Charges After Venturing into Morden
    May 31, 2024
  • Kornelsen School Reunion Sparks Old Flames
    March 30, 2017
  • Mennonites Gather Today to Solemnly Forget
    November 11, 2016
  • City of Winkler to Stage Massive Publicity Stunt to Compete With Steinbach
    July 23, 2016

Trending

  • GTA Prepares for Largest Deposit of Snow Since the Rob Ford Administration
    January 25, 2026
  • Every American School to be Supplied with their Very Own Dairy Cow
    January 24, 2026
  • Mennonite Man Gets Standing Ovation in Switzerland
    January 22, 2026
  • Andrew Unger Gifted Secondhand Nobel Prize for Literature
    January 21, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • King Charles Unveils Stunning New Portrait
    May 15, 2024
  • Fraser Valley Renamed ‘Frasier Valley’ After Kelsey Grammer Visit
    July 20, 2022
  • New Biopic Reveals Freddie Mercury’s ‘Secret Wild Mennonite Life’
    February 16, 2019
  • Putin “Too Busy Shirtless Hunting” to Attend Gorbachev’s Funeral
    September 1, 2022
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Theatres Empty for New Documentary About My Taunte Lina

January 31, 2026

Premiers Gather in Saskatoon for Annual Crokinole Tournament

January 29, 2026

Area Man to Pretend Super Bowl Actually Matters to Distract Himself from Everything Else Going On in the World Right Now

January 28, 2026

Climber Scales Credit Union Building Without Safety Gear

January 27, 2026

“Up is Down” and “Down is Up” New Report Suggests

January 26, 2026

Unger Games

  • Premiers Gather in Saskatoon for Annual Crokinole Tournament
    January 29, 2026
  • Area Man to Pretend Super Bowl Actually Matters to Distract Himself from Everything Else Going On in the World Right Now
    January 28, 2026
  • Winnipeg Jets Sign Mennonite Senior to Bring Some Youth to the Team
    January 19, 2026
  • New Season of ‘Heated Rivalry’ to Feature Manitoba’s Top Crokinole Players
    January 17, 2026
  • Steinbach Mayor Wins Grand Slam of Butchering
    January 12, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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