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Unger the Influence

“I thought it was me as a trajchtmoaka,” Trump says

April 13, 2026

WASHINGTON, DC After posting a blasphemous AI-generated photo of himself as Jesus this weekend, President Trump is now saying he had no idea it was Jesus and actually thought it was him as a traditional […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Man Wears His Very Best Carhartt to Church

April 12, 2026

AYLMER, ON After months of reminders from his wife Susie to “dress sharp” for church once in a while, area man Rob Letkeman decided to wear his very best Carhartt jacket this Sunday. “And Carhartt […]

Unger Conviction

  • Neighbourhood Church Has Staff of 30 Pastors for Some Reason
    July 7, 2022
  • Confused Out-of-Towners Attend Every Mennonite Church in Fort Garry
    December 10, 2017
  • Local Church Adds Cake-Baking to List of Holy Sacraments
    June 6, 2018

Unger & Thirst

  • Man’s Face Left in Permanent Pucker After Rhubarb Platz-Eating Contest
    June 5, 2016
  • Mennonite Man Shames Restaurant by Weighing Farmer Sausage to Prove it’s Underweight
    August 1, 2021
  • Pigeon With Backpack Full of Knackzoat Caught at BC Prison
    January 10, 2023

Unger the Influence

  • George Washington Completely “Absolved” in New Epstein Files
    February 1, 2026
  • Premiers Gather in Saskatoon for Annual Crokinole Tournament
    January 29, 2026
  • “Up is Down” and “Down is Up” New Report Suggests
    January 26, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Mennonite Woman Scores Historic Victory on ‘Jeopardy!’
    June 5, 2019
  • Mennonite Family Still Waiting in Line at Penner Foods Parcel Pick-up
    August 2, 2018
  • Andrew Unger Slowly Becoming Rudy Wiebe
    April 9, 2022
  • Tractor Trek Takes Wrong Turn and Ends Up in Downtown Winnipeg
    June 9, 2024

Trending

  • Taber Arena Will No Longer Be Flooded With Schmaunt Fat After Winning Kraft Hockeyville
    April 5, 2026
  • Peters “Makes It to First Base” Giving Hope to Young Men Across Winkler
    April 4, 2026
  • Pam Bondi Offered Promising New Career in Multilevel Marketing
    April 3, 2026
  • Mennonite Children Excited for Annual Paska Bun Hunt
    April 2, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Mennonite Hymn Wins Eurovision Song Contest
    May 23, 2025
  • Sunwing Passengers Stranded in La Crete, Alberta
    January 6, 2023
  • Mennonite Woman to Listen to Nothing but the Boney M Christmas Album for the Next Six Weeks
    November 21, 2017
  • Mennonite Sniper Sets Record for World’s Longest Deliberately-Missed Shot
    June 24, 2017
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Americans Demand the Flooding of Saskatchewan and Manitoba to Give their Ships Easier Access to Canadian Oil

April 11, 2026

Thousands of Poultry Farmers Accidentally Show Up at ‘National Poetry Month’ Event

April 10, 2026

Killing People Only Way to Achieve Lasting Peace, Leaders Insist

April 8, 2026

Mennonite Man Sent To Unclog Space Toilet

April 7, 2026

Family Manages to Get On a Record Three Rides During Weeklong Trip to Disney

April 6, 2026

Unger Games

  • Taber Arena Will No Longer Be Flooded With Schmaunt Fat After Winning Kraft Hockeyville
    April 5, 2026
  • Peters “Makes It to First Base” Giving Hope to Young Men Across Winkler
    April 4, 2026
  • Jason Kelce Spotted on Manitoba Farm in Full Mennonite Attire
    March 11, 2026
  • American Victory Part of Chinese Government Plot to Get Canadians to Quit Playing Hockey
    February 26, 2026
  • Trump to Award Connor Helleybuyck Nation’s Highest Honour: The Undisputed Champion of Beautiful Clean Coal
    February 25, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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