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Unger Suspicion

Baal Really Excited for New Statue in His Honour

May 17, 2026

MIAMI, FL The ancient Canaanite deity Baal is super excited to have a statue in his honour placed just outside the Trump golf course in Florida. “I haven’t been honoured in such a public fashion […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman to Dust Entire Province of Manitoba

May 15, 2026

CARMAN, MB Mrs. Loewen of Carman has been enlisted by Manitoba Premier Wab Kinew to dust the entire province this weekend. “That was quite the dust storm,” said Kinew. “But luckily we have women like […]

Unger Conviction

  • Mennonite Man Suspended from Church for the Next 4 Sundays
    June 4, 2021
  • Affluent Attention-Starved Couple Lodges Complaint Against Pastor for Not Visiting them as Often as Actual People in Need
    July 13, 2019
  • Stop Playing God! 7 Ways You’re Playing God Without Even Realizing It!
    August 3, 2021

Unger & Thirst

  • Hipsters Flock to Rural Manitoba to Take Selfies with Knackzoat
    August 8, 2018
  • Mennonite Man Can’t Figure Out What to Make for Supper Tonight
    April 2, 2024
  • Mennonite Women Required to Have their Purses Checked as They Exit Buffet Restaurant
    May 12, 2024

Unger the Influence

  • Mennonites Hired to Drain the Strait of Hormuz
    March 17, 2026
  • Conservatives Vote to Reaffirm Party Leader Mark Carney
    March 6, 2026
  • Funk and Penner Endorse Penner for Goertzen’s Job Reports Peters from Reimer
    March 1, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Mennonite Man’s Vocabulary Reduced to ‘Once’, ‘Yet’, and ‘Such’
    August 5, 2017
  • Mennonite Couple Sneak In Quick Meddachschlop During Second Intermission
    April 16, 2019
  • Friesen Girls Have Got Those Old ‘Back to Home School’ Blues
    August 28, 2022
  • Grandma Still Thinks ‘Danny Orlis’ Books Make Great Birthday Presents
    September 27, 2016

Trending

  • Mennonite Man Doesn’t Have Enough Space on Census Form to List All His Kids
    May 7, 2026
  • Tariffs Move Leafs’ Pick from First to Sixty-Seventh
    May 6, 2026
  • Man Who Aced Cognitive Test Can’t Tell Jesus From a Doctor
    May 5, 2026
  • Mennonite Man Finally Takes Off His Winter Tires
    May 4, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Larry Norman Updates Song: “Why Doesn’t the Devil Have Any Good Music?”
    February 12, 2017
  • Bargain-Hungry Shoppers Flock to the Wrong Hudson Bay
    March 16, 2025
  • Entire Province of Manitoba Hikes ‘Hunt Lake Trail’ All at Once
    July 5, 2021
  • Top Ten Mennonite Movies of 2018
    December 29, 2018
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Donald Trump Tells Iran He Holds All the Cards

May 13, 2026

90-Year-Old Grandma Emerges Victorious in Senior Assassin 2026

May 12, 2026

Mennonite Man Sets Record for Tallest Bowl at Mongo’s Grill

May 10, 2026

Nationwide Cottage Cheese Shortage Causes Mennonites to Compromise Cherished Values for First Time Ever

May 9, 2026

Webster’s Dictionary Redefines “Ceasefire” as “Active Battle”

May 8, 2026

Unger Games

  • Donald Trump Tells Iran He Holds All the Cards
    May 13, 2026
  • Tariffs Move Leafs’ Pick from First to Sixty-Seventh
    May 6, 2026
  • Taber Arena Will No Longer Be Flooded With Schmaunt Fat After Winning Kraft Hockeyville
    April 5, 2026
  • Peters “Makes It to First Base” Giving Hope to Young Men Across Winkler
    April 4, 2026
  • Jason Kelce Spotted on Manitoba Farm in Full Mennonite Attire
    March 11, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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