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The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Aunt Shocked To Discover She’s Been Excluded From Family Group Chat This Whole Time

July 24, 2026

WINKLER, MB Taunte Tina of Winkler has recently discovered she’d been excluded from the Klippenstein family group chat for the past 10 years. “Oba, they were talking about the upcoming Klippenstein gathering and who was […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites Flock to Nickelback Concert to Collect their 5 Cents

July 23, 2026

WINNIPEG, MB When word got out that Nickelback was in town, thousands of Mennonites flocked to the arena in Winnipeg this week to collect their refund. “I heard this is the place to get my […]

Unger Conviction

  • Mennonite Man Wears Steel Toe Boots to Church
    December 19, 2022
  • Mennonite Pastor Launches New Line of $99 NFT Trading Cards
    December 26, 2022
  • Mennonite Couple Visits Every Single MB Church in the Fraser Valley
    July 8, 2022

Unger & Thirst

  • Mennonite Woman Takes Home the Super Bowl
    February 7, 2021
  • Swiss and Dutch Mennonites Find Common Ground in Their Love for Cheese
    October 17, 2016
  • Grandkids Still Reluctant to Go Anywhere Near Grandma’s Plumi Moos
    March 29, 2018

Unger the Influence

  • Webster’s Dictionary Redefines “Ceasefire” as “Active Battle”
    May 8, 2026
  • Man Who Aced Cognitive Test Can’t Tell Jesus From a Doctor
    May 5, 2026
  • James Comey Indicted Over ‘606 47’ Seashell Photo
    May 3, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Mennonite Woman Fills Tub…Then Adds Water
    July 3, 2017
  • Mennonite Woman Buys Back Her Own Clothes at the MCC Store
    March 1, 2018
  • Choking Mennonite Man Saved by the Heinrichs Maneuver
    June 15, 2019
  • Totally Normal Steinbach Bungalow to be Preserved at Local Museum
    November 21, 2016

Trending

  • Mennonite Woman Lucks Out With New Licence Plate
    July 16, 2026
  • Mennonite Soccer Fans Devastated as England “Fe’schluckes” Yet Again
    July 15, 2026
  • Folk Fest Attendee Sells Spot in the Shade for $500 a Square Foot
    July 14, 2026
  • Thousands of Canadians Flock to Mexico to Cool Off this Summer
    July 13, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Twitter Unveils New Logo
    July 24, 2023
  • The GameStop Frenzy Explained for Mennonites (Using an Easy to Understand Zoat Analogy)
    February 1, 2021
  • “That’s a personal question”: Area Politician Remains Silent on Science and Logic
    August 2, 2021
  • Mennonite Couple Air Their Grievances on Jerry Springer Show
    July 20, 2017
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Massive Algae Bloom Discovered Beneath Gordie Howe Bridge

July 22, 2026

Area Couple Enjoys Delicious Meal of Authentic Mennonite Food

July 21, 2026

Christopher Nolan Casts Pacifist Mennonite Farmer as Odysseus

July 20, 2026

US Strikes Iran With Their Most Powerful Weapon: Taco Bell Lettuce

July 19, 2026

Trump to Fence Off the Border to Keep Out Canadian Smoke

July 18, 2026

Unger Games

  • Mennonite Soccer Fans Devastated as England “Fe’schluckes” Yet Again
    July 15, 2026
  • White Sox to Feature All-Mennonite Starting Lineup
    July 11, 2026
  • Soccer Player Gets Red Card for Yawning
    July 10, 2026
  • FIFA Agrees to Let Trump Officiate Tonight’s World Cup Match
    July 6, 2026
  • Canada Loses to Morocco After Not Getting Enough Pucks to the Net
    July 5, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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