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Unger Games

Mennonite Couple Make Sure to Eat at Home Before Jets Game

October 30, 2026

ALTONA, MB When the Friesens of Altona got free nosebleed tickets to the Jets game this week, they were put in quite the predicament. “Looks like we’re going to have to pre-game it,” said Susie, […]

Unger & Thirst

City’s Top Chef Mortified to Discover His ‘Charcuterie Board’ is Just Glorified Faspa

October 29, 2026

VANCOUVER, BC The chef at Vancouver’s top restaurant has been feeding the city’s elite for years with his delectable selection of charcuterie. Unfortunately, chef Pierre’s ego took a big hit this weekend after a trip […]

Unger Conviction

  • Pastor to Fight Epidemic of Mennonite Men Wearing Shorts in Church
    June 1, 2025
  • Nation Eliminates Poverty with $100 Million Investment in Jesus Commercials
    February 13, 2024
  • Mennonite Man Wows Audience with Stunning Performance of that Piano Song You Play with Your Knuckles
    March 30, 2018

Unger & Thirst

  • Mennonite Man Comes Home with the Wrong Old Dutch
    November 17, 2022
  • Custodian at Local Senior’s Home Can’t Get the Smell of Roll Kuchen Out of the Hallway
    September 13, 2018
  • Shocking New Photos Show Dramatic Glacier Retreat
    January 9, 2020

Unger the Influence

  • Albertans to Vote on Whether to Vote on Whether to Vote on Whether to Vote on Separation
    October 11, 2026
  • Pentagon Introduces New “Firing Squad” Video Game for Kids
    October 10, 2026
  • British Columbians Can’t Decide Which Mennonite to Vote For
    October 6, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Virgin Births Nothing Rare in Mennonite Country
    December 24, 2017
  • Mennonite Funeral Movie ‘The Burial’ Shocks Audiences with Sheer Lack of Pickles
    October 18, 2023
  • Rules for Dating My Mennonite Daughter
    October 16, 2017
  • Mennonite Couple Manage to Have 20 Children in 15 Years
    December 3, 2021

Trending

  • Roundup Introduces New Product to Eliminate Election Signs in Your Yard
    October 21, 2026
  • Mennonite Church’s Annual ‘Costume and Candy Party’ Eerily Similar to Halloween
    October 19, 2026
  • Mennonites Encouraged to Get Out and Vogt
    October 18, 2026
  • Alberta Separatists Hire Mennonites to Show Them How It’s Done
    October 17, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Taylor Swift is Unrecognizable in Music Video for ‘The Menno’
    February 28, 2020
  • Prime Minister, Bryan Adams Share Roll Kuchen in Altona
    September 5, 2026
  • Edmonton Area Pastor Sworn in as New Alberta Health Minister
    April 13, 2021
  • Tim Hortons Collaborates with Gordon Lightfoot for New ‘Gordon Bits’
    December 22, 2021
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Person Under 70 Shocks Community By Voting

October 28, 2026

Elizabeth Holmes Takes On Trajchtmoaka Job in Winkler

October 26, 2026

Mennonite Beats Mennonite with Votes from Mennonites

October 25, 2026

Winnipeg Mayoral Candidate Accidentally Uses Pictures of Winkler

October 23, 2026

Edmonton Mennonites Big Fans of Mayor Knack-Zoat

October 22, 2026

Unger Games

  • Mennonite Couple Make Sure to Eat at Home Before Jets Game
    October 30, 2026
  • Connor Hellebuyck Leads League With Impressive 0.00 GAA So Far This Season
    October 5, 2026
  • Entire Population of Winnipeg Asks for Trade Out of Winnipeg
    September 24, 2026
  • Hellebuyck Demands Chance to Shit the Bed in the Playoffs for Another Team
    September 15, 2026
  • Riders Get Called For ‘Too Many Mennonites’
    September 13, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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