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Unger Conviction

Mennonite Man Leaves Faspa Early to Avoid Cleaning Up the Chairs

June 24, 2026

WINKLER, MB At faspa this week, James Dueck, 37, of Winkler scrambled out of the church gymnasium just as soon as he’d wolfed down his cheese curds and dills. The reason? He was sick and […]

Unger Suspicion

Libertarian Accidentally Walks Down Public Sidewalk

June 23, 2026

TOFIELD, AB Committed libertarian Rand Martens, 31, was walking home from his Dungeons and Dragons game this week when he found himself walking smack dab in the middle of a public sidewalk. “Oh, look at […]

Unger Conviction

  • Mennonite Church to Pipe in Fake Crowd Noise
    February 25, 2021
  • Church New Year’s Eve Party Over By 8 PM
    December 31, 2017
  • Mennonite Pastor Launches String of F-Bombs in Last Sermon Before Retirement
    July 25, 2018

Unger & Thirst

  • Mennonite Women Required to Have their Purses Checked as They Exit Buffet Restaurant
    May 12, 2024
  • Mennonite Man Woos Potential Spouse by Eating Takis Fuego
    February 14, 2024
  • Penner Family Celebrates Cousin Peter’s Graduation from the Kid’s Table
    May 4, 2018

Unger the Influence

  • Man Who Aced Cognitive Test Can’t Tell Jesus From a Doctor
    May 5, 2026
  • James Comey Indicted Over ‘606 47’ Seashell Photo
    May 3, 2026
  • Hog Farmers Concerned as Manitoba Seeks to Ban AI
    May 2, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • A Mennonite Word Search Puzzle!
    June 13, 2018
  • Pool Table Discovered in Church Elder’s Basement
    November 7, 2017
  • Ex-Mennonite Accidentally Leans Over Onto the Non-Shunned Table
    April 18, 2021
  • Mennonite Lady Claims Annual Quilt Auction is ‘Rigged’
    October 19, 2016

Trending

  • Musk Tries Desperately to Squeeze Camel Through Eye of This Needle
    June 14, 2026
  • Mennonite Man with Million-dollar Tractor Stakes a Stand Against “Pride”
    June 13, 2026
  • Conflict-Averse Mennonites Getting Really Into Soccer to Watch All the Ties
    June 12, 2026
  • Every Self-Respecting Mennonite Cheering for Paraguay in World Cup Opener Friday
    June 11, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Mennonite Woman Challenges Marie Kondo to Cleaning Competition
    February 17, 2019
  • Satire Sites to Post Real News Today
    April 1, 2017
  • NASA Confirms the Existence of Mennonites on Other Planets
    November 24, 2016
  • Local Gas Station to Offer Free Eye-Gouging or Kick in the Groin with Every Purchase
    September 26, 2022
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Mennonite Couple Honour Dad by Making Him Come Over and Fix Stuff

June 21, 2026

Recently Retired Jonathan Toews Scrambles to Get His Name on the Fernwood Waiting List

June 20, 2026

Canadians Celebrate as List of ‘Sports We Don’t Suck At’ Balloons to Two

June 18, 2026

Trump Vows to Make Washington Reflecting Pool as Beautiful as Lake Winnipeg

June 17, 2026

Alberta Man Votes to Stay in Canada After Discovering Honey Dill Sauce

June 15, 2026

Unger Games

  • Recently Retired Jonathan Toews Scrambles to Get His Name on the Fernwood Waiting List
    June 20, 2026
  • Canadians Celebrate as List of ‘Sports We Don’t Suck At’ Balloons to Two
    June 18, 2026
  • Conflict-Averse Mennonites Getting Really Into Soccer to Watch All the Ties
    June 12, 2026
  • Every Self-Respecting Mennonite Cheering for Paraguay in World Cup Opener Friday
    June 11, 2026
  • Mennonite Church to Host UFC Fight
    June 7, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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