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Unger & Thirst

Mr. Hamm to Return to Ancestral Name of Mr. Schinkjefleisch

April 23, 2026

SELKIRK, MB Local accountant Bobby Hamm of Selkirk says he’s sick and tired of hiding his true identity and will be known as Bobby Schinkjefleisch from now on. “It was time,” said Schinkjefleisch. “I’ve been […]

Unger Conviction

Mr. Harms Promises He Won’t Hurt Anybody

April 22, 2026

MARTENSVILLE, SK The folks in Martensville were on high alert this week after it was announced that Mr. Harms from Waldheim would be speaking in church next Sunday. “Nah, oba. I don’t like the sound […]

Unger Conviction

  • Pourer Gets Dunked Just to Make Sure
    June 1, 2020
  • Local Church to Host Weekly ‘Superspreader Potluck’
    October 16, 2020
  • Mennonite Woman Feels Really Guilty for Not Feeling Guilty Enough
    December 30, 2016

Unger & Thirst

  • Prankster Leaves Cases of ‘Free Beer’ on Mennonite Doorsteps
    September 9, 2017
  • Portland Brewery Offers Vaccine Tasting Flight
    December 19, 2020
  • Grandma Cookies Now Made from Freshly Harvested Grandmas
    November 11, 2023

Unger the Influence

  • James Talarico Article Pulled from the Unger Review
    February 19, 2026
  • White House Demands New Bridge Be Rerouted to Epstein Island
    February 11, 2026
  • George Washington Completely “Absolved” in New Epstein Files
    February 1, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Peace Talks in Winkler-Morden Move Toward ‘Two-State Solution’
    February 2, 2018
  • Mennonite Couple to Replace Harry and Meghan at Buckingham Palace
    January 13, 2020
  • Local Bible College Records First Nasty Breakup of the Year
    September 1, 2024
  • Mennonite Woman Has Friesen Toews
    January 21, 2024

Trending

  • Conservatives Form Majority Government
    April 14, 2026
  • “I thought it was me as a trajchtmoaka,” Trump says
    April 13, 2026
  • Mennonite Man Wears His Very Best Carhartt to Church
    April 12, 2026
  • Americans Demand the Flooding of Saskatchewan and Manitoba to Give their Ships Easier Access to Canadian Oil
    April 11, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Mennonite Man Opens Southern Manitoba’s Largest Aura Farm
    November 22, 2025
  • Aylmer Pastor Awarded Nation’s Highest Honour: A Stained Dirty Star on Canada’s Walk of Fame
    March 28, 2021
  • Winnipeg Woman Denied Entry to Folk Festival for Failing to Wear Blundstones
    July 13, 2025
  • Mennonites Flock to Bob Ross Exhibit
    August 18, 2019
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City of Steinbach Issues ‘Boil Schmaunt Fat’ Advisory

April 21, 2026

Server Stops By to Ask if Everything’s Tasting Good So Far Just as Area Man Takes Final Bite

April 20, 2026

Doug Ford to Exclusively Travel by Horse and Buggy from Now On

April 19, 2026

Fans Petition Rock and Roll Hall of Fame to Induct Paraguayan Harpist Eduard Klassen

April 18, 2026

Angine de Poitrine Turn Out to be a Couple Mennonite Boys from Winkler

April 15, 2026

Unger Games

  • Taber Arena Will No Longer Be Flooded With Schmaunt Fat After Winning Kraft Hockeyville
    April 5, 2026
  • Peters “Makes It to First Base” Giving Hope to Young Men Across Winkler
    April 4, 2026
  • Jason Kelce Spotted on Manitoba Farm in Full Mennonite Attire
    March 11, 2026
  • American Victory Part of Chinese Government Plot to Get Canadians to Quit Playing Hockey
    February 26, 2026
  • Trump to Award Connor Helleybuyck Nation’s Highest Honour: The Undisputed Champion of Beautiful Clean Coal
    February 25, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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