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Unger Games

Entire Population of Winnipeg Asks for Trade Out of Winnipeg

September 24, 2026

WINNIPEG, MB Inspired by goalie Connor Helleybuyck and quarterback Dieter Brock, the entire population of Winnipeg has requested a trade out of Winnipeg. “If I knew it was that easy, I would have done this […]

The Daily Bonnet

Left Lane Between Steinbach and Blumenort to be Designated “Slow Minivan Lane”

September 22, 2026

BLUMENORT, MB After extensive traffic studies on Highway 12 north of Steinbach this summer, the Manitoba Road Authority has decided to designate the left lane to be used exclusively by families driving excruciatingly slow and/or […]

Unger Conviction

  • Local Couple Finds Themselves Completely Alone in Church on May Long Weekend
    May 19, 2019
  • Calgary Church Threatens to Leave Town Unless Government Pays for Massive New Building
    June 9, 2017
  • Pastor’s Wife Offers Makeup Lessons
    November 19, 2017

Unger & Thirst

  • Banquet-Goers Wowed By Yet Another Chicken Kiev Meal
    July 3, 2016
  • Schmaunt Fat Confused for Waffle Sauce
    June 20, 2024
  • Mennonite Couple Celebrate Anniversary By Splitting Meal at Chicken Chef
    August 24, 2025

Unger the Influence

  • Trump Calls Andrew Unger “Untalented, Totally Not Funny,” Demands Cancellation of The Unger Review
    May 31, 2026
  • Trump to “Completely Destroy” Military He “Completely Destroyed” Last Week
    May 30, 2026
  • Carney Just One MP Resignation Away From Minority Government the People Voted For
    May 29, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Five Controversial Topics You Can’t Joke About With Mennonites
    March 31, 2018
  • Mom’s Spoon Preferred to Dad’s Belt, Survey Results Suggest
    April 29, 2018
  • Local Couple Not Nearly as Rich as Huge Wad of Canadian Tire Money Suggests
    May 27, 2017
  • Five Common Misconceptions About Mennonites
    March 9, 2017

Trending

  • Carney Sends Mennonite Delegates to Negotiate with the EU
    September 16, 2026
  • Hellebuyck Demands Chance to Shit the Bed in the Playoffs for Another Team
    September 15, 2026
  • Wab Kinew Returns to Steinbach to Mow the Boulevards
    September 14, 2026
  • Riders Get Called For ‘Too Many Mennonites’
    September 13, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Justin Trudeau Confuses Yerba Mate for Marijuana
    August 12, 2016
  • Patrik Laine Traded to the Blumenort Menno Knights
    October 25, 2020
  • World Breathes Collective Sigh of Relief as Zoom Goes Down
    May 17, 2020
  • Seniors Start New Baby Boom to Overtake Millennials
    February 21, 2024
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Electrician Busy Explaining to Concerned Mennonites what ‘AC/DC’ Really Means

September 21, 2026

Mennonite Woman Ruins Perfectly Good Cinnamon Buns By Adding Raisins

September 20, 2026

Ed Sheeran Drops Mennonite Choir from North American Tour

September 19, 2026

Australian Pastor Apologizes, Says He Shouldn’t Have Preached Hourlong Sermon with Diarrhea

September 18, 2026

Frugal Mennonites Excited for the Permanent Daylight Savings

September 17, 2026

Unger Games

  • Entire Population of Winnipeg Asks for Trade Out of Winnipeg
    September 24, 2026
  • Hellebuyck Demands Chance to Shit the Bed in the Playoffs for Another Team
    September 15, 2026
  • Riders Get Called For ‘Too Many Mennonites’
    September 13, 2026
  • Connor Hellebuyck Demands Trade to Blumenort Menno Knights
    September 1, 2026
  • Massive Simon Hildebrandt Statue Appears Outside MBCI
    August 16, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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