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Unger the Influence

Winnipeg Mayoral Candidate Accidentally Uses Pictures of Winkler

October 23, 2026

WINNIPEG, MB Winnipeg mayoral candidate Calvin Kleinsasser had a lot of explaining to do this week after his team accidentally ran an ad that included photos of Winkler, Manitoba instead of Winnipeg. “I don’t know […]

Unger the Influence

Edmonton Mennonites Big Fans of Mayor Knack-Zoat

October 22, 2026

EDMONTON, AB Edmonton’s small but growing Mennonite community has come to rally around their new-ish mayor after discovering he shared an interest in their favourite snack. “Nah, oba, I really had no interest in municipal […]

Unger Conviction

  • Church Elders to Investigate Member’s Involvement in Wordle Cheating Scandal
    February 6, 2022
  • Hundreds of Mennonites Show Up at Church on Onewheels
    August 15, 2020
  • General Conference Strikes Last Minute Deal to Lift Tariffs on Mennonite Brethren
    August 17, 2026

Unger & Thirst

  • Mennonite Woman in Existential Crisis at Grocery Store
    September 2, 2026
  • Mennonites Buy Naming Rights to New Edmonton Arena
    March 14, 2018
  • Silly Americans Don’t Even Realize it’s Thanksgiving
    October 12, 2025

Unger the Influence

  • British Columbians Can’t Decide Which Mennonite to Vote For
    October 6, 2026
  • Trump Promises Mennonites $5000 Worth of Bubbat if They Vote Republican
    October 3, 2026
  • Wab Kinew Returns to Steinbach to Mow the Boulevards
    September 14, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Mennonite Bureau of Investigations Raids Indiana Mansion
    August 14, 2022
  • Mennonite Woman in Existential Crisis Trying to Figure Out When to Throw Out the Christmas Cards
    January 11, 2024
  • Mennonite Women Star in Hit New Series ‘The Real Housewives of Holmes County’
    January 4, 2019
  • Mennonite Couple Select the Perfect Pair of Crocs for a Night on the Town
    July 7, 2021

Trending

  • American School Bans ‘The Handmaid’s Tale’ For Being Canadian
    October 14, 2026
  • White House Reinstates Day to Honour Guy Who Directed ‘Home Alone’
    October 13, 2026
  • Mennonite Woman Arrested for Buying Her Pumpkin Pie at Costco
    October 12, 2026
  • Albertans to Vote on Whether to Vote on Whether to Vote on Whether to Vote on Separation
    October 11, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Music Fans Celebrate as Ticketmaster Earns Zero Dollars this Month
    May 28, 2020
  • “That’s a personal question”: Area Politician Remains Silent on Science and Logic
    August 2, 2021
  • Local Man Dies of Boredom Watching Soccer
    July 2, 2018
  • Bernie Sanders’s Mittens Sworn in as President of the United States
    May 2, 2016
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Roundup Introduces New Product to Eliminate Election Signs in Your Yard

October 21, 2026

Mennonite Church’s Annual ‘Costume and Candy Party’ Eerily Similar to Halloween

October 19, 2026

Mennonites Encouraged to Get Out and Vogt

October 18, 2026

Alberta Separatists Hire Mennonites to Show Them How It’s Done

October 17, 2026

Incoherent White House Press Secretary Actually Speaking Low German

October 16, 2026

Unger Games

  • Connor Hellebuyck Leads League With Impressive 0.00 GAA So Far This Season
    October 5, 2026
  • Entire Population of Winnipeg Asks for Trade Out of Winnipeg
    September 24, 2026
  • Hellebuyck Demands Chance to Shit the Bed in the Playoffs for Another Team
    September 15, 2026
  • Riders Get Called For ‘Too Many Mennonites’
    September 13, 2026
  • Connor Hellebuyck Demands Trade to Blumenort Menno Knights
    September 1, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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