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The Daily Bonnet

5 Worst Mennonite Jokes of All Time

May 18, 2025

So the other day I noticed that Meta AI was posing questions below my articles on Facebook –they’ve been doing it for a while now. Recently, they posed a question about Mennonite jokes. So I […]

Unger Suspicion

Steinbach Eyes $10 Billion Monorail

May 16, 2025

STEINBACH, MB Looking for a way to speed up transportation from the MCC store downtown to the Walmart out on the highway, Steinbach residents are now seriously considering a new citywide monorail system. “It’ll stop […]

Unger Conviction

  • Man Who Attends Gender Segregated Church Really Upset About Not Being Allowed to Go Where He Wants to Go and Do What He Wants to Do
    September 25, 2021
  • New Mennonite Parents Invite Friends Over for ‘Denomination Reveal Party’
    September 20, 2020
  • Who is the ‘Mennonite Pope’?
    October 18, 2017

Unger & Thirst

  • Resourceful Mennonite Woman Makes Do With Hamburger Patties and Hot Dog Buns
    May 25, 2020
  • $80 Million Carton of Eggs Smashes Record in Sotheby’s Auction
    February 7, 2025
  • Mennonite Woman Nearly Fe’schluckes Herself
    February 22, 2018

Unger the Influence

  • Mark Carney Drops Out of All-Important Plautdietsch Leadership Debate
    April 12, 2025
  • Politicians Eager to Dupe Mennonites into Thinking they Support Mennonite Values
    April 7, 2025
  • Mennonite Farmer Hires Pierre Poilievre to Count His Chickens Before they’re Hatched
    April 2, 2025

The Daily Bonnet

  • The Proper Pronunciation of Common Russian Mennonite Surnames
    December 30, 2016
  • Mennonite Woman Shocked that Her Poinsettia Survived Until Christmas this Year
    December 25, 2023
  • Poll: Vote Now to Decide the Name of Steinbach’s Newest Park!
    October 14, 2016
  • Completely Predictable Mennonite Couple Places Garbage Can Under the Sink
    January 5, 2019

Trending

  • Team of Industrious Amish Hired to Fix McDonald’s Ice Cream Machine
    May 10, 2025
  • Festival to Feature New Chilliwack Cover Band Called Abbotsford
    May 9, 2025
  • Mennonites Excited to Have a Brand New Pope to Disregard
    May 8, 2025
  • Mennonite Woman Mentors Mark Carney on How to Bite His Tongue
    May 7, 2025

Unger Suspicion

  • Local Woman Dies While On Hold With Phone Company
    May 8, 2019
  • Twitter Mourns the Loss of Jerry Lee Lewis
    August 20, 2017
  • Vancouver Heat Wave Blamed On Hot Air From Abbotsford
    June 27, 2021
  • Mennonite Swifties to Exchange ‘Frintschoft’ Bracelets this Weekend
    November 16, 2024
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New Trade Deal Has Torontonians Scrambling to Find Manitoba on a Map

May 15, 2025

Jets Fan Relieved He Finally Has His Evenings Free to Get Some Yardwork Done

May 14, 2025

Baseball Commissioner Reinstates Shoeless Joe Just to Ruin ‘Field of Dreams’ for Everybody

May 13, 2025

Dallas Stars Sign Lionel Messi Now that NHL Allows Kicking

May 12, 2025

Steinbach Blessed with Pleasant Aroma of Manure Just in Time for Mother’s Day

May 11, 2025

Unger Games

  • Jets Fan Relieved He Finally Has His Evenings Free to Get Some Yardwork Done
    May 14, 2025
  • Baseball Commissioner Reinstates Shoeless Joe Just to Ruin ‘Field of Dreams’ for Everybody
    May 13, 2025
  • Dallas Stars Sign Lionel Messi Now that NHL Allows Kicking
    May 12, 2025
  • Jets Fans Pack Streets for Annual First Round Exit Party
    April 30, 2025
  • Jets Mesmerized By the Big City Sights and Sounds of St. Louis, Population 301,578
    April 26, 2025

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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