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Unger Suspicion

FIFA Awards Donald Trump Nobel Prize for Literature

October 8, 2026

WASHINGTON, DC Moments after Canadian poet Anne Carson was announced as the winner of the 2026 Nobel Prize for Literature, a furious Donald Trump took to social media to announce his displeasure. “They’re out to […]

Unger Suspicion

Massive E-Scooter Outbreak Strikes Southern Manitoba

October 7, 2026

STEINBACH, MB Steinbach, Manitoba has experienced a massive e-scooter outbreak this summer as thousands of locals have taken to the streets and sidewalks in an effort to disregard their own safety or the safety of […]

Unger Conviction

  • Retailers Quick to Cash In as Foot Washing Becomes Latest Gen Z Trend
    February 17, 2024
  • Mennonite Church Introduces New See-Through Coffee
    February 18, 2024
  • Visitor to Mennonite Church Blinded By All the Blond Hair
    November 3, 2017

Unger & Thirst

  • Mennonite Man Buys a Round of Tap Water for the Whole Bar
    March 11, 2019
  • All Steinbach Restaurants to Serve Nothing but Pizza from Now On
    December 16, 2025
  • King Charles: “White House Dinner Not as Delicious as the Vereniki I Had in Steinbach Back in 1970”
    April 30, 2026

Unger the Influence

  • Vandals Caddyshack the Reflecting Pool
    June 26, 2026
  • Trump Vows to Make Washington Reflecting Pool as Beautiful as Lake Winnipeg
    June 17, 2026
  • Trump Calls Andrew Unger “Untalented, Totally Not Funny,” Demands Cancellation of The Unger Review
    May 31, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Mennonite Heritage Village Offers Time Travel for a Lot Less than the Cost of a Delorean
    August 21, 2018
  • Mennonite Man Wins Nobel Peace Prize for Remembering to Lift the Toilet Seat
    March 29, 2024
  • Chappell Roan to Settle Down in Modest Swift Current Bungalow
    August 14, 2025
  • Mennonites Go Crazy for New Cryptocurrency the ‘Plettcoin’
    December 27, 2017

Trending

  • Hundreds of Legal Potash Dispensaries to Open in Saskatchewan
    September 26, 2026
  • Entire Population of Winnipeg Asks for Trade Out of Winnipeg
    September 24, 2026
  • Left Lane Between Steinbach and Blumenort to be Designated “Slow Minivan Lane”
    September 22, 2026
  • Electrician Busy Explaining to Concerned Mennonites what ‘AC/DC’ Really Means
    September 21, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Area Man Still Can’t Get that Pink Pie
    February 17, 2021
  • A List of Things Erroneously Blamed on Violent Video Games
    March 13, 2018
  • Entire Province of Manitoba to Call in Sick Tomorrow
    November 24, 2019
  • Selfie-Taking City Woman Eaten By Giant Mutant Venus Sunflower Plant
    August 6, 2018
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British Columbians Can’t Decide Which Mennonite to Vote For

October 6, 2026

Connor Hellebuyck Leads League With Impressive 0.00 GAA So Far This Season

October 5, 2026

Trump Promises Mennonites $5000 Worth of Bubbat if They Vote Republican

October 3, 2026

Police Raid Home Suspected of Hosting Wild All-Night Tupperware Party

October 2, 2026

AI Claims It Won’t Kill All Humans and There’s Nothing to Worry About

September 27, 2026

Unger Games

  • Connor Hellebuyck Leads League With Impressive 0.00 GAA So Far This Season
    October 5, 2026
  • Entire Population of Winnipeg Asks for Trade Out of Winnipeg
    September 24, 2026
  • Hellebuyck Demands Chance to Shit the Bed in the Playoffs for Another Team
    September 15, 2026
  • Riders Get Called For ‘Too Many Mennonites’
    September 13, 2026
  • Connor Hellebuyck Demands Trade to Blumenort Menno Knights
    September 1, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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