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Unger Suspicion

AI Claims It Won’t Kill All Humans and There’s Nothing to Worry About

September 27, 2026

SILICON VALLEY, CA After several disturbing reports by AI experts that claimed there was a 10% chance AI would kill us all within 10 years, new studies written by AI show that there’s actually nothing […]

Unger Suspicion

Hundreds of Legal Potash Dispensaries to Open in Saskatchewan

September 26, 2026

REGINA, SK Residents of Saskatchewan have voted overwhelmingly this week to legalize potash dispensaries across the province. “We’ve gotta do something to keep up with Belarus,” said Regina resident Barry Broesky. “I’m sure with all […]

Unger Conviction

  • Mennonite Sunday School Class to Discuss Ethics of Doing ‘Cash Jobs’
    August 6, 2022
  • College and Career Glow Bowling Event Results in Record Number of Hook-Ups
    October 20, 2016
  • Churches to Install VLTs as Part of Alberta’s Phase 2 Reopening Plan
    June 16, 2020

Unger & Thirst

  • Entire Province Forced to Live Like Mennonites as Liquor Stores Close
    August 11, 2023
  • Tim Hortons Introduces Full Line of Yerba Products
    September 22, 2017
  • Steinbach Residents to Vote on Whether to Acknowledge Each Other in the Liquor Store
    May 31, 2016

Unger the Influence

  • Trump Calls Andrew Unger “Untalented, Totally Not Funny,” Demands Cancellation of The Unger Review
    May 31, 2026
  • Trump to “Completely Destroy” Military He “Completely Destroyed” Last Week
    May 30, 2026
  • Carney Just One MP Resignation Away From Minority Government the People Voted For
    May 29, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Mennonites Demand the Return of Prime Minister Stephen Harder
    January 15, 2022
  • Mennonites Desperate to Find Some Relation to Davy Klaassen
    November 23, 2022
  • Young Man on Life Support after Dangerous Game of Russian Mennonite Roulette
    August 3, 2017
  • Outhouses Coming Back in Style with Trendy Mennonite Millennials
    July 24, 2017

Trending

  • Australian Pastor Apologizes, Says He Shouldn’t Have Preached Hourlong Sermon with Diarrhea
    September 18, 2026
  • Frugal Mennonites Excited for the Permanent Daylight Savings
    September 17, 2026
  • Carney Sends Mennonite Delegates to Negotiate with the EU
    September 16, 2026
  • Hellebuyck Demands Chance to Shit the Bed in the Playoffs for Another Team
    September 15, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Mark Zuckerberg Breaks Down, Admits He Has No Real Friends
    January 27, 2022
  • Ottawa to Ban Social Media for Kids and Replace it with Hinterland Who’s Who
    June 10, 2026
  • “That’s a personal question”: Area Politician Remains Silent on Science and Logic
    August 2, 2021
  • Controversial Alt-Mennonite Leader is Fed Up With Being Told Not to Judge
    December 3, 2016
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Entire Population of Winnipeg Asks for Trade Out of Winnipeg

September 24, 2026

Left Lane Between Steinbach and Blumenort to be Designated “Slow Minivan Lane”

September 22, 2026

Electrician Busy Explaining to Concerned Mennonites what ‘AC/DC’ Really Means

September 21, 2026

Mennonite Woman Ruins Perfectly Good Cinnamon Buns By Adding Raisins

September 20, 2026

Ed Sheeran Drops Mennonite Choir from North American Tour

September 19, 2026

Unger Games

  • Entire Population of Winnipeg Asks for Trade Out of Winnipeg
    September 24, 2026
  • Hellebuyck Demands Chance to Shit the Bed in the Playoffs for Another Team
    September 15, 2026
  • Riders Get Called For ‘Too Many Mennonites’
    September 13, 2026
  • Connor Hellebuyck Demands Trade to Blumenort Menno Knights
    September 1, 2026
  • Massive Simon Hildebrandt Statue Appears Outside MBCI
    August 16, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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