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Unger Suspicion

Hundreds of Legal Potash Dispensaries to Open in Saskatchewan

September 26, 2026

REGINA, SK Residents of Saskatchewan have voted overwhelmingly this week to legalize potash dispensaries across the province. “We’ve gotta do something to keep up with Belarus,” said Regina resident Barry Broesky. “I’m sure with all […]

Unger Games

Entire Population of Winnipeg Asks for Trade Out of Winnipeg

September 24, 2026

WINNIPEG, MB Inspired by goalie Connor Helleybuyck and quarterback Dieter Brock, the entire population of Winnipeg has requested a trade out of Winnipeg. “If I knew it was that easy, I would have done this […]

Unger Conviction

  • Kirk Cameron Reaffirms Belief in ‘Eternal Conscious Torment’ After Sitting Through One of His Own Movies
    December 11, 2025
  • Mennonite Church’s Shocking Peace Plan Revealed in Group Chat
    March 26, 2025
  • Epic Fail! MBer and GCer Make Feeble Attempt at Singing the Doxology Together
    September 7, 2020

Unger & Thirst

  • Mennonite Man Becomes ‘Completely Hooked’ on the Pink Stuff
    August 12, 2019
  • Demolished Winkler Tower Cripples City’s Schmaunt Fat Supply
    November 23, 2021
  • Neufeld Downs Entire Grey Cup Filled with Komst Borscht
    December 13, 2021

Unger the Influence

  • Trump Calls Andrew Unger “Untalented, Totally Not Funny,” Demands Cancellation of The Unger Review
    May 31, 2026
  • Trump to “Completely Destroy” Military He “Completely Destroyed” Last Week
    May 30, 2026
  • Carney Just One MP Resignation Away From Minority Government the People Voted For
    May 29, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • New Law Mandates 6:30 Bedtime for Mennonites
    January 16, 2017
  • Every Single Street in Steinbach to Go Under Construction Simultaneously…and Reverted to Gravel
    June 22, 2016
  • Cindy Klassen Spotted Wearing Skates at Beach
    August 2, 2017
  • Innovative Mennonite Kids Fill Super Soakers with Hand Sanitizer
    July 14, 2020

Trending

  • Frugal Mennonites Excited for the Permanent Daylight Savings
    September 17, 2026
  • Carney Sends Mennonite Delegates to Negotiate with the EU
    September 16, 2026
  • Hellebuyck Demands Chance to Shit the Bed in the Playoffs for Another Team
    September 15, 2026
  • Wab Kinew Returns to Steinbach to Mow the Boulevards
    September 14, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Taylor Swift Announces New Album: ‘Tortured Mennonite Poets Department’
    March 3, 2024
  • Entire Province of Manitoba Hikes ‘Hunt Lake Trail’ All at Once
    July 5, 2021
  • Manitoba’s Vaccine Passport Only Good for Trips to Costa Rica
    June 8, 2021
  • Millions of Homeless Canadian Refugees Flock to US Border After Heatwave Melts Igloos
    August 4, 2018
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Left Lane Between Steinbach and Blumenort to be Designated “Slow Minivan Lane”

September 22, 2026

Electrician Busy Explaining to Concerned Mennonites what ‘AC/DC’ Really Means

September 21, 2026

Mennonite Woman Ruins Perfectly Good Cinnamon Buns By Adding Raisins

September 20, 2026

Ed Sheeran Drops Mennonite Choir from North American Tour

September 19, 2026

Australian Pastor Apologizes, Says He Shouldn’t Have Preached Hourlong Sermon with Diarrhea

September 18, 2026

Unger Games

  • Entire Population of Winnipeg Asks for Trade Out of Winnipeg
    September 24, 2026
  • Hellebuyck Demands Chance to Shit the Bed in the Playoffs for Another Team
    September 15, 2026
  • Riders Get Called For ‘Too Many Mennonites’
    September 13, 2026
  • Connor Hellebuyck Demands Trade to Blumenort Menno Knights
    September 1, 2026
  • Massive Simon Hildebrandt Statue Appears Outside MBCI
    August 16, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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