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The Daily Bonnet

Winkler to Set Clocks One Hour Ahead of Morden

November 1, 2026

WINKLER, MB When the Province announced that Manitobans would no longer be participating in the time change, the City of Winkler pounced on the opportunity to distinguish itself from neighbouring Morden. “We’re establishing a Winkler […]

The Daily Bonnet

Winnipeg Couple Dress as Country’s Scariest Creature: Canada Geese

October 31, 2026

WINNIPEG, MB First time trick-or-treaters Pete and Linda Siemens of North Kildonan had heard you were supposed to dress as something really really scary for Halloween. “So, naturally, we dressed as the scariest creature in […]

Unger Conviction

  • Pastor Lets Church Out Early So People Can Get to Chicken Chef
    June 30, 2019
  • Mr. Harms Promises He Won’t Hurt Anybody
    April 22, 2026
  • Mennonite Sect Heads to Toronto to Await the Rapture
    February 25, 2019

Unger & Thirst

  • ‘Summer McIntosh Borscht’: Mennonites Rename Soup in Honour of Swimmer
    August 1, 2024
  • Caf-Lib a Top Seller at Hip New Mennonite Coffee Shop
    November 2, 2018
  • Shocking Display of Sobriety Shown at Office Christmas Party
    December 26, 2020

Unger the Influence

  • Albertans to Vote on Whether to Vote on Whether to Vote on Whether to Vote on Separation
    October 11, 2026
  • Pentagon Introduces New “Firing Squad” Video Game for Kids
    October 10, 2026
  • British Columbians Can’t Decide Which Mennonite to Vote For
    October 6, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Top Ten Mennonite Movies of 2021
    November 20, 2021
  • City of Abbotsford to be Renamed “Basically Vancouver”
    July 22, 2019
  • Mennonites Driving Up the Price of Sod Huts in Vancouver
    July 5, 2019
  • Mennonite Woman Invokes Emergencies Act to Remove Husband from Bathroom
    February 24, 2022

Trending

  • Winnipeg Mayoral Candidate Accidentally Uses Pictures of Winkler
    October 23, 2026
  • Edmonton Mennonites Big Fans of Mayor Knack-Zoat
    October 22, 2026
  • Roundup Introduces New Product to Eliminate Election Signs in Your Yard
    October 21, 2026
  • Mennonite Church’s Annual ‘Costume and Candy Party’ Eerily Similar to Halloween
    October 19, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • British Columbian Freezes to Death Within Minutes of Arriving in Winnipeg
    January 11, 2018
  • One Million Manitobans Trapped in their Driveways Due to Obstructed Views
    March 6, 2019
  • Royal Couple Name Newborn Baby “Prince Corny”
    April 24, 2018
  • Joe Biden Continues Longstanding American Tradition of Bombing the Hell Out of Foreign Countries
    February 26, 2021
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Mennonite Couple Make Sure to Eat at Home Before Jets Game

October 30, 2026

City’s Top Chef Mortified to Discover His ‘Charcuterie Board’ is Just Glorified Faspa

October 29, 2026

Person Under 70 Shocks Community By Voting

October 28, 2026

Elizabeth Holmes Takes On Trajchtmoaka Job in Winkler

October 26, 2026

Mennonite Beats Mennonite with Votes from Mennonites

October 25, 2026

Unger Games

  • Mennonite Couple Make Sure to Eat at Home Before Jets Game
    October 30, 2026
  • Connor Hellebuyck Leads League With Impressive 0.00 GAA So Far This Season
    October 5, 2026
  • Entire Population of Winnipeg Asks for Trade Out of Winnipeg
    September 24, 2026
  • Hellebuyck Demands Chance to Shit the Bed in the Playoffs for Another Team
    September 15, 2026
  • Riders Get Called For ‘Too Many Mennonites’
    September 13, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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