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Unger Suspicion

Angry Winnipeggers Demand Local Restaurant Installs Giant Animatronic Mouse to Entertain the Kids

November 9, 2026

WINNIPEG, MB When a new Winnipeg restaurant announced this week they would be prohibiting children under 15 from dining at their establishment, thousands of furious Winnipeggers took to the streets to demand not only that […]

Unger & Thirst

Steinbachers Starve for Lack of Fast Food Chains

November 8, 2026

STEINBACH, MB Dozens of Steinbachers expressed their rage on the community Facebook page this week, wondering just when “they” were going to bring a particular fast food restaurant to town. “I’m sick and tired of […]

Unger Conviction

  • New Mennonite Hymnal Eliminates Verse 3 from Every Hymn
    December 4, 2016
  • United Church Totally Rips Off Mennonite Hymnal
    June 19, 2024
  • Hip New Church Bulletin Goes All Comic Sans
    April 9, 2017

Unger & Thirst

  • Mennonites Rank Among the World’s Best Spitters
    April 4, 2017
  • Chihuahua Faspa Cancelled After Oma Runs Out of Queso Menonita
    August 29, 2020
  • Canadian Mennonite Travels All the Way to Belize Just for the Ice Cream
    November 7, 2022

Unger the Influence

  • White House Reinstates Day to Honour Guy Who Directed ‘Home Alone’
    October 13, 2026
  • Albertans to Vote on Whether to Vote on Whether to Vote on Whether to Vote on Separation
    October 11, 2026
  • Pentagon Introduces New “Firing Squad” Video Game for Kids
    October 10, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • How to Tell if Your Christmas Tree is Illegal
    December 20, 2022
  • Manitoba’s Most Progressive Mennonite Man Moves His Clock Forward an Hour
    March 10, 2019
  • Old Colony Mennonites Confused for Trick-or-Treaters
    October 31, 2018
  • Mennonites Excited as Halloween is Cancelled this Year
    October 31, 2020

Trending

  • Winnipeg Couple Dress as Country’s Scariest Creature: Canada Geese
    October 31, 2026
  • Mennonite Couple Make Sure to Eat at Home Before Jets Game
    October 30, 2026
  • City’s Top Chef Mortified to Discover His ‘Charcuterie Board’ is Just Glorified Faspa
    October 29, 2026
  • Person Under 70 Shocks Community By Voting
    October 28, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Mennonite Couple Air Their Grievances on Jerry Springer Show
    July 20, 2017
  • Taylor Swift Ticket Discovered at Thrift Store
    December 1, 2022
  • Trudeau Grows Authentic Menno Beard
    January 18, 2020
  • Productivity Way Down as Canadians Spend All Day Refreshing Test Results Page
    October 29, 2020
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Wab Kinew Accidentally Sets Manitoba on Permanent Summer

November 7, 2026

Mennonite Man Takes 28 Years to Walk from Winkler to Morden

November 5, 2026

Historic Comeback Gives Winnipeg Jets Control of House and Senate

November 4, 2026

Winnipeg Man Absolutely Exhausted Due to Lack of Time Change

November 3, 2026

Winkler to Set Clocks One Hour Ahead of Morden

November 1, 2026

Unger Games

  • Historic Comeback Gives Winnipeg Jets Control of House and Senate
    November 4, 2026
  • Mennonite Couple Make Sure to Eat at Home Before Jets Game
    October 30, 2026
  • Connor Hellebuyck Leads League With Impressive 0.00 GAA So Far This Season
    October 5, 2026
  • Entire Population of Winnipeg Asks for Trade Out of Winnipeg
    September 24, 2026
  • Hellebuyck Demands Chance to Shit the Bed in the Playoffs for Another Team
    September 15, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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