The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger
Unger the Influence

White House Demands New Bridge Be Rerouted to Epstein Island

February 11, 2026

WINDSOR, ON The White House is fuming this week after the new Gordie Howe bridge was set to connect the United States with Canada, instead of the Epstein Island route that they preferred. “We’ve been […]

The Daily Bonnet

Americans Furious About All-Plautdietsch Halftime Show

February 10, 2026

FRESNO, CA Millions of Americans were visibly upset this weekend after they had to sit through the Super Bowl’s first ever all-Plautdietsch halftime show. “Nobody understood a word of it,” said President Donald Trump. “It […]

Unger Conviction

  • Man Escapes Mennonite Section of Heaven, Shocked at What He Finds
    December 30, 2017
  • Mennonite Pastor Scolds Sky for Wearing Too Much Makeup
    November 13, 2025
  • Mennonite Church Bans Google Chrome
    November 29, 2017

Unger & Thirst

  • Mennonite Woman Spends Six Hours Looking for the Right Tupperware Lid
    September 23, 2021
  • Check Out These Wacky Mennonite Dishes Inspired by the Daily Bonnet
    April 10, 2017
  • Pink Whitney Discovered in Mrs. Loewen’s Thermos
    August 13, 2021

Unger the Influence

  • American Soldiers Accidentally Invade Greenland Road
    January 17, 2026
  • Ottawa Disappointed with Gun Buyback Program in Mennonite Country
    January 11, 2026
  • Zwaagstra Vows to Continue Goertzen’s Legacy of Giving Andrew Unger Plenty of Material
    January 8, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • 10 Dutch Blitz Rules You Probably Didn’t Know About
    November 13, 2017
  • Superstore Lot Fills Up With Liquor Mart Customers
    February 19, 2017
  • Ditsied Outpaces Jantsied in Race to Get ‘Jeimpft’
    July 10, 2021
  • Mennonites Eager for Thrift Stores to Reopen
    May 1, 2020

Trending

  • Theatres Empty for New Documentary About My Taunte Lina
    January 31, 2026
  • Premiers Gather in Saskatoon for Annual Crokinole Tournament
    January 29, 2026
  • Area Man to Pretend Super Bowl Actually Matters to Distract Himself from Everything Else Going On in the World Right Now
    January 28, 2026
  • Climber Scales Credit Union Building Without Safety Gear
    January 27, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Tourists Shocked by Absence of Bonnets in Southern Manitoba
    September 6, 2016
  • Hutterite Woman Rollerblades Her Way Into Mennonite Man’s Heart
    July 19, 2018
  • Movie Set in Winnipeg Accidentally Films in Summer
    October 2, 2024
  • Taylor Swift Announces New Album: ‘Tortured Mennonite Poets Department’
    March 3, 2024
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

Mennonite Mom Forces Olympians to Split Medals into Pieces and Share with their Brothers and Sisters

February 9, 2026

Mennonite Choir to Perform at Extra-Alternative Halftime Show

February 8, 2026

Canada to Field Olympic Team Entirely Made Up of Friesens and Froeses

February 6, 2026

Minnesota to be Renamed ‘Manitoba South’

February 3, 2026

George Washington Completely “Absolved” in New Epstein Files

February 1, 2026

Unger Games

  • Mennonite Mom Forces Olympians to Split Medals into Pieces and Share with their Brothers and Sisters
    February 9, 2026
  • Mennonite Choir to Perform at Extra-Alternative Halftime Show
    February 8, 2026
  • Canada to Field Olympic Team Entirely Made Up of Friesens and Froeses
    February 6, 2026
  • Premiers Gather in Saskatoon for Annual Crokinole Tournament
    January 29, 2026
  • Area Man to Pretend Super Bowl Actually Matters to Distract Himself from Everything Else Going On in the World Right Now
    January 28, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved