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Unger Conviction

Eclipse Glasses Required to Safely View Sunday’s Worship Service

August 12, 2026

WINNIPEG, MB Waters of Blessing, an area church well known for its mind-blowing worship hour, is urging parishioners to bring their eclipse glasses along to this weekend’s service. “We’ve heard your cries for more total […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Forgets to Put Star Anise in Her Chicken Soup

August 11, 2026

ALTONA, MB Mrs. Toews was so thoroughly embarrassed with her failure to add star anise to her chicken soup at the soup and pie fundraiser this past week that she has vowed never to make […]

Unger Conviction

  • Mennonites Excited to Have a Brand New Pope to Disregard
    May 8, 2025
  • That Hymn 606 Sure Gets Around
    September 21, 2021
  • Fists Fly After Loewen Family Sits in Penner Family Pew
    February 21, 2017

Unger & Thirst

  • Mennonite Woman Attends Funerals Just for All the Free Food
    September 29, 2019
  • No Tüte for Naughty Uncle Corny This Year
    December 26, 2018
  • Retiring Teacher Quickly Consumes 30 Years Worth of Apples
    June 29, 2017

Unger the Influence

  • Trump Really Excited About New $1.8 Billion Slush Fund
    May 20, 2026
  • Webster’s Dictionary Redefines “Ceasefire” as “Active Battle”
    May 8, 2026
  • Man Who Aced Cognitive Test Can’t Tell Jesus From a Doctor
    May 5, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Mennonite Woman Catfishes Dozens of Men With Notes in Church Mailboxes
    June 23, 2018
  • Meddachschlop Over 60: Five Tips for Mennonite Seniors
    February 3, 2020
  • Poll: Vote Now to Decide the Name of Steinbach’s Newest Park!
    October 14, 2016
  • A Guide to Those Mysterious Swiss Mennonites (for Russian Mennonites)
    January 27, 2019

Trending

  • Rhubarb Discovered on Mennonite Woman’s Vereniki
    August 3, 2026
  • 8 Women Show Up to Claim Prize After Mary Unrau’s Name Called in Raffle Draw
    August 2, 2026
  • Jeff Bridges, John Goodman Reunite for ‘The Big Sawatzky’
    August 1, 2026
  • Mr. Penner Flicks For Triple Word Score
    July 31, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Bargain-Hungry Mennonites Fill Arena for 50 Cent Concert
    September 13, 2023
  • Mennonite Hymn Wins Eurovision Song Contest
    May 23, 2025
  • Phone Companies Reassure Canadians Exorbitant Bills Still Due During Postal Strike
    November 21, 2024
  • Christopher Nolan Casts Pacifist Mennonite Farmer as Odysseus
    July 20, 2026
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Mennonite Man Buys Back All the Albums He Was Forced to Burn in the 70s

August 10, 2026

Reitmans Introduces New ‘Angine de Poitrine’ Line

August 9, 2026

Mennonites Fill Copper Wire Shortage By Stretching Pennies

August 8, 2026

Steinbach Unveils New Public Transit System

August 5, 2026

Mennonite Grandma Punishes Grandkids By Making Them Chew Thrills Gum

August 4, 2026

Unger Games

  • Mennonite Soccer Fans Devastated as England “Fe’schluckes” Yet Again
    July 15, 2026
  • White Sox to Feature All-Mennonite Starting Lineup
    July 11, 2026
  • Soccer Player Gets Red Card for Yawning
    July 10, 2026
  • FIFA Agrees to Let Trump Officiate Tonight’s World Cup Match
    July 6, 2026
  • Canada Loses to Morocco After Not Getting Enough Pucks to the Net
    July 5, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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