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The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Takes 28 Years to Walk from Winkler to Morden

November 5, 2026

MORDEN, MB Back in 1998, Winkler man Karl Broesky kissed his family goodbye and embarked on a journey to the pick up some Chicken Chef in Morden. Now, 28 years later, he’s finally completed his […]

Unger Games

Historic Comeback Gives Winnipeg Jets Control of House and Senate

November 4, 2026

WINNIPEG, MB Just as all hope was lost, the Winnipeg Jets stormed back from a 4-0 deficit last night to take control of the US House and Senate. “It’s hard to stop that blue wave,” […]

Unger Conviction

  • Mennonite Man Accused of Flipping Off the Pastor
    November 9, 2023
  • Choir Director Admits He Really Doesn’t Know What the Heck He’s Doing with His Arms
    March 18, 2018
  • Mennonite Pastor Launches New Line of $99 NFT Trading Cards
    December 26, 2022

Unger & Thirst

  • 24 Hours Later, Dad is Still Going Back for “Just One More Plate”
    June 18, 2018
  • Winkler Co-op Named One of “World’s Greatest Places” by TIME Magazine
    March 30, 2023
  • Mennonite Couple Ill-Prepared for Encounter with ‘Spicy Perogy Pizza’
    February 4, 2024

Unger the Influence

  • White House Reinstates Day to Honour Guy Who Directed ‘Home Alone’
    October 13, 2026
  • Albertans to Vote on Whether to Vote on Whether to Vote on Whether to Vote on Separation
    October 11, 2026
  • Pentagon Introduces New “Firing Squad” Video Game for Kids
    October 10, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • North Kildonan Residents Unimpressed with New Winnipeg Transit Network
    July 7, 2025
  • How’s Your Plautdietsch? Test Your Knowledge of Mennonite Low German.
    September 1, 2017
  • Mennonite Man Runs for Mayor of Vanapag
    October 24, 2022
  • New Vertical Money Confuses Mennonite Man
    August 9, 2019

Trending

  • Person Under 70 Shocks Community By Voting
    October 28, 2026
  • Elizabeth Holmes Takes On Trajchtmoaka Job in Winkler
    October 26, 2026
  • Mennonite Beats Mennonite with Votes from Mennonites
    October 25, 2026
  • Winnipeg Mayoral Candidate Accidentally Uses Pictures of Winkler
    October 23, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Canadian Swifties Demand Taylor Date at Least One CFL Star
    September 25, 2023
  • Televangelist Predicts the Winnipeg Blue Bombers to Win the 2016 Grey Cup
    June 24, 2016
  • Brad Wall Wins Award as Canada’s ‘Best Mennonite Premier’
    February 10, 2017
  • Newfoundland’s Dyck-Shaped Iceberg Goes Viral
    April 29, 2023
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Winnipeg Man Absolutely Exhausted Due to Lack of Time Change

November 3, 2026

Winkler to Set Clocks One Hour Ahead of Morden

November 1, 2026

Winnipeg Couple Dress as Country’s Scariest Creature: Canada Geese

October 31, 2026

Mennonite Couple Make Sure to Eat at Home Before Jets Game

October 30, 2026

City’s Top Chef Mortified to Discover His ‘Charcuterie Board’ is Just Glorified Faspa

October 29, 2026

Unger Games

  • Historic Comeback Gives Winnipeg Jets Control of House and Senate
    November 4, 2026
  • Mennonite Couple Make Sure to Eat at Home Before Jets Game
    October 30, 2026
  • Connor Hellebuyck Leads League With Impressive 0.00 GAA So Far This Season
    October 5, 2026
  • Entire Population of Winnipeg Asks for Trade Out of Winnipeg
    September 24, 2026
  • Hellebuyck Demands Chance to Shit the Bed in the Playoffs for Another Team
    September 15, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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