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Unger & Thirst

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Arrested for Buying Her Pumpkin Pie at Costco

October 12, 2026 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK Area woman Anne Froese, 71, has been taken into custody by Saskatoon policy this weekend after it was discovered she had tried to pass off a Costco pumpkin pie as her own. “When […]

Unger & Thirst

Trump Promises Mennonites $5000 Worth of Bubbat if They Vote Republican

October 3, 2026 Andrew

NEWTON, KS President Donald Trump is trying to win over the Low German Mennonite vote by promising the most lucrative bribe he could think of – bubbat. “Quite frankly, I don’t even know what it […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Ruins Perfectly Good Cinnamon Buns By Adding Raisins

September 20, 2026 Andrew

ALTONA, MB Area woman Theresa Bueckert decided she’d change things up a little and add raisins to her bun dough this week. The results were, as expected, disastrous. “Oba, what was I thinking?” said Mrs. […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Mistakes MLCC for MCC

September 11, 2026 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Local woman Mrs. Froese just moved to town from Jantsied and decided to spend her Saturday afternoon running a few errands. “I asked Mrs. Penner where yet is the Em See See and […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman in Existential Crisis at Grocery Store

September 2, 2026 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Area woman Anne Loewen, 71, was in the greatest existential crisis of her life this Saturday afternoon after encountering bags of frozen potato and cheddar perogies alongside the cottage cheese perogies she’s used […]

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