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Unger Conviction

Mennonite Pastor Enters Sanctuary Hidden in a Broom Cart

June 28, 2023 Andrew

MOUNTAIN LAKE, MN The rumours are true. Video footage confirms this week that Mountain Lake’s most popular pastor Tyler Schmidt sneaks into the sanctuary each Sunday hidden in a broom cart. “Tyleeeeer! Tyleeeer!” screamed Mountain […]

Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Brings Shame to the Entire Friesen Clan by Clapping Between Movements

May 19, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Area man Dan Friesen, 51, sullied the good name of the Friesens this week after clapping between movements during a performance of the Manitoba Chamber Orchestra. “Well, pardon me for showing my appreciation […]

Unger Suspicion

Collective Soul Play Casino Just to Make their Fans Feel Old

April 19, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB 90s rockers Collective Soul will be playing Club Regent Casino in Winnipeg this summer in an attempt to make all their fans feel “really freakin’ old.” “Hey, honey, did you see Collective Soul […]

The Daily Bonnet

Vinyl Outsells CDs at MCC Store for the First Time Since 1987

March 29, 2023 Andrew

SWIFT CURRENT, SK For the first time in more than 30 years, the local MCC store sold more copies of the various vinyl iterations of the Plett Family Singers than they did of the CDs […]

Unger Suspicion

Bruce Springsteen to Finally Experience a Winnipeg Winter

February 15, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB More than 50 years into his career, rock icon Bruce Springsteen will finally be experiencing a Winnipeg winter later this year and local fans are excited at the prospect. “We’ve been trying to […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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