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football

Unger Games

NFL Announces New Gruelling 162-Game Schedule

September 19, 2023 Andrew

NEW YORK, NY In an effort to increase revenues and compete with baseball, starting next season the National Football League will be expanding it’s season to a full 162 games. “I’m not sure how we […]

Unger Suspicion

Sandra Bullock Donates Gently Used Oscar to Local Thrift Store

August 19, 2023 Andrew

FRESNO, CA After it turns out that the woman she portrayed in The Blind Side may not have been precisely the character the film made her out to be, actress Sandra Bullock has decided to […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Couple Claim TV is Just for Watching Billy Graham Specials

April 4, 2023 Andrew

HENDERSON, NE Caught with a television set in their home this week by the church vice squad, the Friesens of Henderson, Nebraska claim they only really use the TV for the two allowable reasons – […]

Unger Conviction

Church AGM Scheduled to Coincide with Most Important Game of the Season

February 23, 2023 Andrew

NEWTON, KS The Eighth Mennonite Church of Newton, Kansas obliged all its members to show up and approve the budget right in the middle of the big game this past week. “Yeah, well, too bad. […]

Unger Games

Spy Balloon Drops Bogus Penalty Flag Onto Field During Dying Minutes of Super Bowl

February 13, 2023 Andrew

GLENDALE, AZ With less than two minutes to go in Super Bowl LVII, an inexplicable penalty flag mysteriously appeared on the field, leaving officials wondering what to do. “Hey, Harold, where’d that flag come from?” […]

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