Sandra Bullock Donates Gently Used Oscar to Local Thrift Store


After it turns out that the woman she portrayed in The Blind Side may not have been precisely the character the film made her out to be, actress Sandra Bullock has decided to donate her Oscar to the local thrift store.

“If you act fast, you might be able to get your very your own Oscar in the ‘2 items for 50 cents’ bin,” said Bullock, who dropped off her Oscar along with a few blouses she wasn’t wearing anymore. “They might even let you throw it in with your broken teacups during the Tuesday afternoon bag sale.”

The news had Mennonites scrambling to get their hands on that thing.

“I don’t like to take something I didn’t earn,” said Mrs. Toews of Fresno. “But the chance to get an Oscar without having to commit the sin of appearing in a movie is an opportunity I just can’t pass up.”

Toews plans to cover up Sandra Bullock’s name with masking tape and scrawl “Best Actress Mrs. Toews” on the trophy with a blue marker.

“That way the ladies at South Fresno MB don’t steal my Oscar while I’m distracted drying the dishes,” explained Toews. “I know that Mrs. Janzen is always eyeing my most prized possessions.”

In addition to tossing her Blind Side Oscar, Bullock also plans to donate her entire salary from Speed 2.

(photo credit: Gage Skidmore/CC)

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