The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

Month: November 2020

Unger Conviction

New Edition of ‘Martyrs Mirror’ to Include Section on Minor Inconveniences Facing the Modern North American Church

November 30, 2020 Andrew

COLUMBUS, OH For centuries Thielman J. van Bright’s 17th century tome Martyrs Mirror or The Bloody Theater has preserved the horrific stories of martyrdom faced by Christians of the past. Now these tales of martyrs being burned […]

Unger Conviction

Area Church Seemingly Doesn’t Realize that God is Not Confined to a Parking Lot

November 29, 2020 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB During their services this morning, one church group in Winnipeg and another one on a dirt road in the RM of Hanover have decided to shatter thousands of years of Christian teaching regarding […]

Unger Suspicion

Etobicoke Eager to Become the New Steinbach

November 28, 2020 Andrew

ETOBICOKE, ON With barbecue joints defying health orders and hundreds of partiers caught not social distancing in a storage locker, the community of Etobicoke, Ontario is eagerly seeking to dethrone Steinbach, Manitoba as the “Covid […]

Unger Conviction

Deceased Members of “One True Church” Find Heaven Super Lonely

November 27, 2020 Andrew

HEAVEN Deceased members of a local congregation claiming to have “figured it all out once and for all back in 1973” have found Heaven super boring and lonely. “I’ve been up here since the summer […]

The Daily Bonnet

Menno Simons Votes from the Grave in US Election

November 26, 2020 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC In a last ditch attempt to keep his spot in the White House, outgoing President Donald Trump has claimed he found evidence that “all sorts of dead people from Conrad Grebel to Menno […]

Posts navigation

1 2 … 6 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Kitchener, Ontario to be Renamed Berlin
    December 4, 2019
  • Canadian Olympic Team to Wear Dirty Mennonite Overalls and Shit Kickers
    April 16, 2021
  • Trump Offers to Buy Newfoundland from Canada
    August 23, 2019
  • A List of Things American Mennonites Can Buy with their $600 Stimulus Checks
    January 23, 2021
  • There’s No Reimer Friesen for Mennonite Man’s Actions
    June 13, 2019

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2023 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved