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The Daily Bonnet

Winkler Man Ruled ‘Too Old’ to be Cruising Main Street

July 10, 2017 Andrew

WINKLER, MB A middle-aged Winkler man was fined on Friday for being ‘forty years too old to be cruising up and down Main Street all evening.’ Lyle Dueck, 65, was caught doing laps with the younger […]

The Daily Bonnet

Courageous Local Man Arrives on Job Site in Japanese Truck

June 10, 2017 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Local flooring installer Daniel Dick of Steinbach pulled up to the construction site on Tuesday in a 1983 Datsun 720 crew cab, the sight of which caused considerable laughter among his GMC, Chevy […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man to Drive the Entire Trans-Canada Highway in the Left Lane

May 10, 2017 Andrew

HALIFAX, NS Mennonite man Paul Warkentin is about to embark on a cross-country journey in his ’03 Malibu to raise awareness about safe and courteous driving. The entire trip, which begins in Halifax on Monday, […]

The Daily Bonnet

Cruisers to Have Exclusive Access to Steinbach Main Street on Friday Nights

May 5, 2017 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Starting this weekend, cruisers will be given exclusive rights to make use of Steinbach’s Main Street on Friday nights from 6 pm to 3 am, “for whatever purposes they may require.” “It’s just […]

The Daily Bonnet

Car Air Conditioner to Face Off Against Heated Seat in Epic Battle this April

April 20, 2017 Andrew

MITCHELL, MB The Hieberts are a lovely couple with a happy marriage…or so they thought. Since the beginning of April the Mitchell area couple have been engaged in an epic struggle for temperature control during recent […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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