The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

Month: April 2017

The Daily Bonnet

Local Woman Introduces New ‘Extra Sour’ Funeral Pickles

April 30, 2017 Andrew

ALTONA, MB Area woman Susanna Koop has recently hauled out a batch of ‘extra sour’ pickles from her cellar that she feels will go over well at local funerals this spring. “Springtime funeral-goers in Mennonite […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Family Feeds Hungry Puppies at Local Buffet

April 29, 2017 Andrew

LEAMINGTON, ON A Sunday smorgasbord at a local diner turned into a feeding frenzy, with area Mennonite families sneaking their beloved pets into the buffet line. By just 12:30 the roast beef was completely gone because […]

Uncategorized

‘Choose the band from this list I have not seen in concert’: by Uncle Corny Loewen

April 28, 2017 Andrew

BY: ONKEL CORNY LOEWEN Oba, so on the Internets I noticed all these Enjelsch people posting lists of the music groups they have gone to see at the local barn loft or whatever. Well, I’ve gone […]

Uncategorized

Nordstrom Sells $600 ‘Authentic Mennonite-Worn’ Dirty Jeans

April 27, 2017 Andrew

SEATTLE, WA Mennonite hog farmers across North America are ecstatic at the new opportunity to sell their old dirty sweaty jeans at a huge profit to Nordstrom. “I don’t know why those English want our […]

Unger Suspicion

Trump Deploys Aircraft Carrier to Attack Canadian Dairy Cows

April 26, 2017 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC According to a report from Fox News, US President Donald Trump has approved the deployment of five heavily armed aircraft carriers to the Canadian Prairies in order to combat the imminent danger posed by […]

Posts navigation

1 2 … 10 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Fred Penner’s Cat Fails to Return
    March 24, 2017
  • Loewen Family Totally Destroys Dueck Family
    January 20, 2019
  • Donald Trump Replaces Entire NFL With Russian Ballerinas
    September 26, 2017
  • Jason Kenney Quits Politics to Become One of Those Wacko Street Preachers
    May 22, 2022
  • Recent Overdoses in Altona May Be Linked to Star Anise
    July 17, 2018

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2023 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved