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Unger & Thirst

Steinbach Woman Calls Police About Long Line at Krispy Kreme

June 23, 2024 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Area woman Mrs. Hiebert, 81, of Steinbach called in a police report this morning after she noticed a long time of vehicles stretching all the way from the new Kripsy Kreme in Winnipeg, […]

Unger & Thirst

‘Wurst’ Turns Out to Be the ‘Best’

June 17, 2024 Andrew

WINKLER, MB They’ve been making the wurst in southern Manitoba for decades and one wurst maker has finally created the best. “You won’t find a better wurst in all of Winkler,” said local butcher Mr. […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Grandfather Shocked to Discover He’s Actually Greek

May 25, 2024 Andrew

MENNVILLE, MB Area man Walter Dyck, 81, of Mennville took a trip into Winnipeg this week and was shocked to discover the word Opa! plastered all over the city’s Greek restaurants. “As soon as I […]

Unger the Influence

Angry MP Calls Yerba Mate Gourds ‘Woke’

May 9, 2024 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON Conservative MP Lindsey Rude says she’s sick and tired of all the environmentally-friendly yerba mate gourds she sees around town. “The gourds are bad enough,” said Rude, “but they’ve even got those woke […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Prays So Long the Food Gets Cold

April 4, 2024 Andrew

SWIFT CURRENT, SK Mr. Gary Krahn set a new record in Swift Current this weekend by praying a full 2 hours and 15 minutes before the meal this Sunday afternoon. “Oba, he doesn’t need to […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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