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food

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Impressed with Such Large Portions of Such Poor Quality Food

January 3, 2025 Andrew

AYLMER, ON Area man Garry Kehler, 57, was very impressed with the huge portions of grisly disgusting “beef” he received at his favourite local diner Dave’s Feeding Trough. “Nobody else is doing portion sizes like […]

Unger & Thirst

Banana Turns Brown Mere Seconds After Entering House

December 11, 2024 Andrew

ELKHART, IN Tina Yoder, 61, of Elkhart had just got out of the theology class she’s been auditing, when she decided she needed to stop by at the grocery store for a few items before […]

Unger Games

Mennonite Runner Turns Map Into Giant Dancing Dill Pickle

December 9, 2024 Andrew

KITCHENER, ON Area man Gabe Eby, 29, has been jogging all over KW during the past few months creating patterns on his running app that his fellow Mennonites will find recognizable and comforting. “At first […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Unable to Identify His Own Wife’s Potato Salad at Church Potluck

November 4, 2024 Andrew

BOW ISLAND, AB Dave Pankratz, 61, of Bow Island, Alberta was in quite the predicament at the church potluck this week as he tried to identify his own wife’s potato salad from among the more […]

Unger the Influence

JD Vance Has ‘Cringey’ Visit to Mennonite Roll Kuchen Shop

August 26, 2024 Andrew

REEDLEY, CA Vice Presidential hopeful JD Vance stopped by in one of Reedley, California’s famous roll kuchen shops this week to pick up an order and win over a few voters. However, things did not […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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