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winter

Unger Suspicion

Mennonite Man Finally Escapes Snow Maze After Spring Melt

March 7, 2021 Andrew

ST. ADOLPHE, MB Art Broesky, 58, of Niverville decided to visit “that big snow maze they’ve got up there in St. Adolphe” as soon as it opened this winter. Well, after six weeks trying to […]

The Daily Bonnet

“Oba, it’s Getting Dark, Henry”: Manitoba Couple Always in Bed by 4:30 this Time of Year

December 28, 2020 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Retired couple Henry and Barb Thiessen of North Kildonan are usually hitting the hay a little after 4 pm these days or just as soon as it gets dark. “We had a couple […]

Unger Suspicion

Canadians Forced to Winter in Canada this Year

October 14, 2020 Andrew

TORONTO, ON For the first time in almost a hundred years, millions of Canadians will be forced to suffer through one of their own winters. “Diewel, if I had known it was this bad, I’d […]

Unger Suspicion

Farmer’s Almanac Predicting Winter to Follow Autumn this Year

September 23, 2020 Andrew

MOUNTAIN LAKE, MN In its boldest seasonal projection yet, the Farmer’s Almanac is predicting that autumn 2020 will be followed swiftly by winter 2020, which will carry over into early 2021 and be followed by […]

The Daily Bonnet

Unseasonable Warmth Has Mennonites Flocking to the Pits

January 26, 2020 Andrew

HOCHSTEIN, MB As temperatures have risen well above freezing this week, Mennonites across southern Manitoba have been flocking to the local gravel pits for a swim. “Kjnels, don’t forget the zoat!” yelled Jakob Krahn, as […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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