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Unger Suspicion

Area Man Spends 5 Hours Trying to Find the End of a Roll of Tape

September 5, 2023 Andrew

HENDERSON, NE Area man Jim Friesen spent the good part of an afternoon this weekend trying to find the end of a roll of tape. “It was as smooth as an uncut watermelon,” explained Friesen. […]

Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Frequents Thrift Store to Avoid Doing Laundry

May 29, 2023 Andrew

NEWTON, KS Local MCC volunteers have finally discovered why local woman, Erin Friesen, 44, of Newton, Kansas frequents their store 3 or 4 times a week. “Every time she’s got a load of laundry to […]

Unger Games

Winnipeg Jets Players Offered Part Time Jobs at Portage Place

March 11, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Rumours are swirling about the potential sale of Portage Place to True North, which is really exciting for all the Jets players clamouring to get part time custodial jobs. “I realized hockey wasn’t […]

The Daily Bonnet

Top 10 Stocking Stuffer Ideas for Mennonites

December 16, 2022 Andrew

Let’s face it. Gone are the days when a paper bag filled with peanuts is sufficient to satisfy the demands of a Mennonite child. These days all the city Mennos prefer socks filled with various […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman in Existential Crisis at Grocery Store

November 29, 2022 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Area woman Anne Loewen, 71, was in the greatest existential crisis of her life this Saturday afternoon after encountering bags of frozen potato and cheddar perogies alongside the cottage cheese perogies she’s used […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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