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Month: March 2023

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Couple Eagerly Anticipate Turning the Page on their MCC Calendar

March 31, 2023 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK It’s that time of the month when Mennonite couples gather at the refrigerator to flip the next page of their MCC calendars. “Harry, come quick, it’s almost midnight. Time to flip the MCC […]

Unger & Thirst

Winkler Co-op Named One of “World’s Greatest Places” by TIME Magazine

March 30, 2023 Andrew

WINKLER, MB TIME magazine has just declared the Co-op in Winker as one of the top 100 “greatest places in the world.” “That’s just one more feather in our cap,” said Winkler mayor Henry Siemens. […]

The Daily Bonnet

Vinyl Outsells CDs at MCC Store for the First Time Since 1987

March 29, 2023 Andrew

SWIFT CURRENT, SK For the first time in more than 30 years, the local MCC store sold more copies of the various vinyl iterations of the Plett Family Singers than they did of the CDs […]

Unger Suspicion

Mickey Mouse Learns Plautdietsch to Accommodate All the Mennonites at Disney World Right Now

March 28, 2023 Andrew

ORLANDO, FL With a bevy of cheap flights sending Mennonites to Florida this week, residents of Disney World have been brushing up on their Plautdietsch, not to mention the theme park’s record-setting order of roll […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Confuses Wendy’s Ketchup Cup for Communion

March 27, 2023 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Local man Steve Wiens, 40, was very excited to pump his own ketchup at the local Wendy’s restaurant this week, especially given that it was Communion Sunday. “Oh look, communion cups!” proclaimed Wiens, […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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