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shopping

Unger Conviction

Retailers Quick to Cash In as Foot Washing Becomes Latest Gen Z Trend

February 17, 2024 Andrew

GOESSEL, KS It’s the wave that’s sweeping the nation: foot-washing. Millennials, Gen Zers – you name it, they’re doing it. After a popular Super Bowl commercial last week, retailers were quick to capitalize on the […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman to Go Around Naked Now that Reitman’s is Closed

January 16, 2024 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Area woman Agatha Martens, 73, is concerned she’ll be left with absolutely nothing to wear now that Reitman’s is closing. Martens relied so heavily on purchasing her floral blouses and navy blue slacks […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man is Just About Ready to Start His Christmas Shopping

December 23, 2023 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Area man Dave Wiens figured he was just about ready to start Christmas shopping and so decided to venture out to the mall in Vanapag this morning. “I know a lot of my […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Feeds Entire Family on Costco Hot Dogs

December 19, 2023 Andrew

CALGARY, AB The Wiens family of Linden loaded up the Dodge Caravan this afternoon for their weekly trip to Costco to enjoy really cheap hot dogs. “This time we brought along Oma and Opa and […]

Unger Suspicion

Steinbach Man Crashes into Giant Tiger

December 7, 2023 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Wildlife specialists were called to downtown Steinbach this week after area man Michael Teichrob, 21, crashed right into a giant tiger on Main Street. “Gosh, I’ve heard of accidents with moose and elk, […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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