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The Daily Bonnet

Frugal BC Mennonites Excited for the Permanent Daylight Savings

March 3, 2026 Andrew

YARROW, BC There was a buzz in the church lobby at South Yarrow MB this week after the province announced there would be permanent daylight savings. “Oba, I expect savings during at an MCC bag […]

Unger Suspicion

Bargain-Hungry Shoppers Flock to the Wrong Hudson Bay

March 16, 2025 Andrew

CHURCHILL, MB With rumours swirling that Hudson Bay may be going into creditor protection and liquidating their assets, thousands of customers made the 1500 km trek from Winnipeg to get their hands on some amazing […]

The Daily Bonnet

New Winkler Costco to Open Up on West End of Winnipeg

February 16, 2025 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Winkler is finally getting its own Costco store, which will be conveniently located just an hour and a half away in Winnipeg. “Finally, Winkler’s getting a Costco!” proclaimed local man John Penner. “It’s […]

Unger Suspicion

Woman Waits 2 Weeks for Service at Local Hardware Store

January 9, 2025 Andrew

GRUENBACH, SK Area woman Lauren Kehler, 31, went to the service desk at the local hardware store with a question about caulking and was still unacknowledged a full 2 weeks later. “I guess I’ll stick […]

Unger & Thirst

Banana Turns Brown Mere Seconds After Entering House

December 11, 2024 Andrew

ELKHART, IN Tina Yoder, 61, of Elkhart had just got out of the theology class she’s been auditing, when she decided she needed to stop by at the grocery store for a few items before […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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