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romance

The Daily Bonnet

Erotic Schekjbenjel Novel Tops NY Times Bestseller List

July 5, 2017 Andrew

NEW YORK, NY In what is sure to spur on a wave of imitators, famed erotic novelist Darlene Steele has recently released her first Schekjbenjel romance book. The novel entitled Bedtime in Blumenort debuted at number one on […]

The Daily Bonnet

Homewrecker Wrecks Record 30th Home

June 27, 2017 Andrew

KITCHENER, ON During a homewrecking career that spanned more than six decades, local seductress Alice Kehler, 81, has been responsible for the break-up of a record thirty marriages in the Kitchener area. “I think I have […]

Unger Suspicion

Local Woman Renews Her Vows to Facebook

May 30, 2017 Andrew

VICTORIA, BC Local woman and loyal social media user Alice Loewen, now retired and living on Vancouver Island, has decided to renew her vows to Facebook on their ten year anniversary. “I love Facebook as much […]

The Daily Bonnet

How to Seduce a Mennonite Man (A Guide in Pictures)

May 25, 2017 Andrew

After years of research, with countless false starts and failed attempts, the ladies here at the Daily Bonnet have finally perfected the art of seducing a Mennonite man. Here is a step-by-step guide to winning […]

The Daily Bonnet

The Most Effective Mennonite Pick-Up Lines

May 6, 2017 Andrew

The Daily Bonnet sent out a team of single people (spinsters, grumpy old men, young people being pressured by their frintschoft to ‘get married already’, etc.) to try out their best pick-up lines. Their effectiveness […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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