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pacifism

Unger Suspicion

Pacifist Lions on Verge of Extinction

January 24, 2017 Andrew

KRUGER NP, SOUTH AFRICA According to recent reports by wildlife biologists in South Africa, the population of pacifist lions has been in steady decline over the past few decades. The number of non-resistent lions is […]

Unger Suspicion

Public is Shocked to Discover Quakers Are More than Just Oats

January 4, 2017 Andrew

PHILADELPHIA, PA Thanks to some silly marketers in the late 19th century, the general public has associated Quakers almost exclusively with oats. What has been obscured with this ‘oatization’ of the Quakers is their long-standing advocacy […]

The Daily Bonnet

Boxing Day Deemed ‘Far Too Violent’ by Mennonite Church

December 26, 2016 Andrew

ROSENORT, MB An area Mennonite pastor is urging his parishioners not to participate in Boxing Day activities this winter over concerns that the traditional holiday promotes violence. “I just don’t like the sound of it,” […]

Unger Suspicion

‘Pacifism is Totally Impractical’ Says Large Multinational Weapons Manufacturer

December 1, 2016 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC Arms industry leaders met in Washington this week to discuss ways of curbing the growing wave of pacifism that’s sweeping the nation. “How the hell can we expect to keep the economy going […]

Unger Suspicion

Pacifist-Thriller ‘Hacksaw Ridge’ Lures Reluctant Mennonites into Movie Theatre

November 18, 2016 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB For decades rural Manitoba movie theatres had trouble convincing more conservative elements of the population that attending movies was not actually explicitly forbidden in the Scriptures. Ever since the invention of moving pictures in […]

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