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grandma

The Daily Bonnet

Missing Comma Causes Serious Concern for Mennonite Grandma

April 10, 2021 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Oma Kehler of Winkler was very concerned for her safety after receiving a text from her grandchild Andy that said, “Lets eat Oma.” “Oba, nay!” exclaimed Grandma Kehler. “Eating Oma? Just what will […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Grandma Eager to Start ‘Remote Learning’

March 20, 2021 Andrew

SWIFT CURRENT, SK When her local school announced they would be going to “remote learning” this semester, Mrs. Wiebe of Swift Current was eager to sign up for the course. “I’ve struggled with that remote […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Mother and Daughter Give Birth Just Hours Apart

January 16, 2021 Andrew

ST. JACOBS, ON Edith Funk, 42, of St. Jacobs gave birth to a bouncing baby boy named Jacob just three hours before her daughter Bethany, 20, gave birth to Edith’s first granddaughter Breanne. “I was […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Grandmas Hired to Lead National Contact Tracing Program

November 5, 2020 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK Oma Rempel of Saskatoon has just signed on to head the Canadian national contract tracing program. “We knew we had to go to the experts,” said Prime Minister Trudeau. “Plus no one could […]

Unger & Thirst

Grandma Wiens is About to Try this Mysterious New Substance

July 29, 2020 Andrew

MORDEN, MB For the very first time in her life, Mrs. Wiens is about to try out this mysterious slightly yellowy liquid she’s never seen before in her life. She was offered this yellowy water […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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