Pourer Gets Dunked Just to Make Sure


Local man Mr. Klassen has lived his whole life with deep-seated fears that his pouring baptism at the age of 19 just wasn’t good enough.

“So, I’ve finally decided to get dunked,” said Klassen. “Better safe than sorry!”

Thankfully Mr. Klassen found an MB church that was willing to take him.

“They asked if I’d been baptized before and I said, ‘yeah, well, kind of,'” explained Klassen. “But I’m really not sure the minister did a thorough enough job. Barely got my hair wet…”

Klassen explained that a regular pouring might be sufficient for a fine upstanding individual like Mrs. Reimer, whose greatest sin was the time she spoke curtly to one of the Sunday School children who was a little out of control. However, for a man who’s spent his whole life closet-drinking and plowing on Sundays, he felt a more thorough cleansing might be necessary.

“I’m not sure his theology is correct on this, but we’ll take him,” said Pastor Ron. “We haven’t had a good dunking in a while, and it always brings in a crowd.”

Meanwhile, a half dozen MBers are planning to get poured at the local GC church for fear that they’d accidentally “overdone it a bit.”

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