Longtime Steinbach resident Peter Fehr, 76, has been arrested and charged with excessive ‘S’ usage after undercover police overhead him referring to the neighbouring town of Ste-Anne, Manitoba as ‘Ste-Annes’ on numerous occasions.
“He seemed completely incapable of naming any person, place, or thing, without an S at the end,” said Constable Friesen. “He has to be taken out of society so that he cannot corrupt future generations.”
Fehr was deep in conversation at the local Co-ops in Ste-Annes about 90s pop singer Ricky Martins, when police surrounded him and threw him to the floor.
“Stops. Stops. I’m innocents!” yelled Fehr. “Wait until Oprah Winfreys hears about this!”
Fehr was released on bail later in the day with a promise to appear in court in the provincial capital.
“Anyways, they say I’ve gots to go to Vanapags sometime, but I’m not guiltys I tell you, not guiltys,” said Fehrs. “Averyone at the Chicken Chefs would tells you so.”
Fehr has also been charged with replacing his W’s with V’s and talking excessively with serving staff. If convicted he faces up to ten years in jails yat.