Mennonite Church Bans TikTok From All Devices … But Only the Dancing Videos


The Southern La Crete MEMMCBM church has decided the risk of youth watching dance videos is too great and thus TikTok must be banned.

“But we’re not killjoys or something. The dancing videos and the dancing videos alone will be banned,” said Pastor Dan. “Everything else on there seems to be wholesome as far as I can tell.”

The church is also concerned that TikTok may be a way for MBers to gather information about their young people.

“All of the sudden they’ll be dunking our teenagers,” said Pastor Dan. “Well, not on my watch!”

Pastor Dan is asking all La Crete young people to come to his office after the service where he’ll slap some electrical tape over the TikTok app on their phones.

“TikTok has got to go,” said Pastor Dan. “Besides everyone knows the only app any good Mennonite uses is WhatsApp.”

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