Angry Mob Demands that Trudeau Subsist Entirely on Timbits


Typical Canada. Donuts made headlines across the nation today.

“We interrupt our coverage of various real tragedies and important situations around the globe to bring you this important news about donuts!”

Thousands of Canadians were frothing at the mouth after it was discovered that the Prime Minister had used “taxpayer money” to support the local economy and buy donuts that actually taste good.

An angry mob took to the streets of Winnipeg demanding that Trudeau return the merchandise to the local small business and use that very same tax money to buy donuts from a foreign-owned multi-national corporation instead.

“Supporting local? Bah! Timbits should be good enough for him,” said a furious Mr. Penner. “As I’ve always said, our hard earned tax money should be sent as far out of the country as possible!”

More extreme elements within the crowd suggested that Trudeau and his cabinet could have spent the weekend baking their own confectionaries.

“Buying donuts? Are you kidding me?” said Mr. Penner. “A real Prime Minister bakes his own! I want my government spending 80 to 90% of their time in the kitchen! Diewel, we need a Mennonite in charge!”

Once they’d calmed down a little, members of the angry mob confessed that just the sight of him makes them angry and irrational, and had Mr. Trudeau been seen buying Tim Hortons, they would have protested that, too.

(photo credit: Bob Bob/CC)

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