The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

vegetables

Unger & Thirst

Mrs. Kehler Tries to Pass Off Store Bought Tomatoes as Garden Tomatoes

September 12, 2019 Andrew

GRETNA, MB Absolutely no one was believing Mrs. Kehler after she tried to sneak in a few store bought tomatoes onto the platter at faspa this week. “She even had the nerve to slice them […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Walks Around All Day with Kale in Her Teeth

August 5, 2019 Andrew

NORTH KILDONAN, MB Susan Dueck, 43, of North Kildonan has been walking up and down Henderson Highway today doing her errands with a huge piece of kale in her teeth. The embarrassing piece of kale […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonites Eager to Try New ‘Beyond Formavorscht’ Burger

June 21, 2019 Andrew

SCHTEINBACK, MB Eager to capitalize on the popular fake meat trend, local farmer sausage makers have come up with an enticing new product called ‘Beyond Formavorscht’, which, apparently tastes just like the real thing yet! […]

Unger & Thirst

Steinbachers to Vote on Whether to Legalize Romaine Lettuce

November 25, 2018 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB After dozens of people have taken ill from E. coli-tainted romaine lettuce, Steinbach city council decided it was time to see how locals felt about this dangerous and addictive substance. “We’re gonna do […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Children Horrified as Grandpa Takes a Bite out of ‘Petunia Rhubarb’

October 21, 2018 Andrew

REINLAND, MB The Brandt kids were settling in for a nice lunch with Grandma and Grandpa, when things got a little awkward. Grandma came into the house and presented the children with a lovely array […]

Posts pagination

« 1 2 3 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Mennonite Man Bares More than Just Arms at St. Malo
    August 7, 2020
  • ‘Free Dance Lessons’ Creates Profound Existential Crisis in Mennonite Town
    October 5, 2016
  • Dallas Stars Sign Lionel Messi Now that NHL Allows Kicking
    May 12, 2025
  • Winnipeg Road Workers Out Installing Fresh New Potholes
    February 25, 2025
  • Ugly Christmas Sweater Party…or Mennonite Family Gathering?
    December 28, 2016

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved