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The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Launches New App WautDeSchissjat

October 4, 2021 Andrew

CAMPO 6, MEXICO Mennonite technology guru Lina Wiebe, 37, of Campo 6 has just launched a brand new social media app called WautDeSchissjat. “It’s the bast app from Chihuahua City to Cuauhtemoc and avery place in […]

Unger Suspicion

Mennonite Man Keeps On Asking Questions He Easily Could’ve Googled

June 28, 2021 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Mr. Klassen set a record today by posting more than thirty times on the local Oba Jo Steinbach page. His posts, however, were made up entirely of things he could’ve easily Googled. “What […]

Unger Suspicion

Angry White Man Reports on All the Horrible Atrocities Facing Angry White Men These Days

June 6, 2021 Andrew

CALGARY, AB Without a touch of irony, local oil executive ‘Brommsch’ Klassen, 37, has been posting memes and poorly sourced articles about how bad things are for him and his buddies, all the while telling […]

The Daily Bonnet

New Facebook Algorithm Only Shows Posts from Your 26 Closest Frintschoft

June 5, 2021 Andrew

FRESNO, CA A study conducted in Fresno, California indicates that Facebook is now only showing posts from your 26 closest frintschoft and has completely blocked posts by Uncle Jake. “Blocking Uncle Jake is no loss, […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Friends Every Single Friesen, Reimer, and Plett on Facebook

May 18, 2021 Andrew

LANDMARK, MB Diane Thiessen, 31, was just taking a jog around the Landmark Feeds building this weekend, when she decided to stop and friend request just a few more Friesen, Reimers, and Pletts. “I couldn’t […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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