The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

shopping

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Caught Shoplifting Rhubarb

August 30, 2024 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK Area woman Maryanne Voth was so desperate to make platz this weekend that she found herself with a temptation she just couldn’t resist: rhubarb. “Usually Anges Froese provides me with all the rhubarb […]

Unger Suspicion

“Man does not live by bread alone”: Loblaws CEO Galen Weston Quotes Jesus to Defend Price-Fixing Scheme

July 25, 2024 Andrew

TORONTO, ON After a court ruling found the company guilty of bread price-fixing, Loblaws CEO Galen Weston cited the words of Jesus in defence of the company’s actions. “Man does not live by bread alone,” […]

The Daily Bonnet

Gen Z Adopts Mennonite Tradition of Covering their Ankles

June 2, 2024 Andrew

MARTENSVILLE, SK 23-year-old Gen Z influencer Evelen Sawatzky of Martensville has a message for Millenials out there – “cover your ankles!” “If you want to look old and out-of-fashion, then keep on wearing those ankle […]

The Daily Bonnet

Aritzia Introduces New Line of Long Denim Skirts for Women Wanting to Look Like They’re in Some Weird Religious Sect

April 18, 2024 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB There were lines outside Aritzia at Polo Park this week as the store launched its new line of long denim dresses and other products inspired by the plain dress sects of southern Manitoba. […]

Unger Conviction

Retailers Quick to Cash In as Foot Washing Becomes Latest Gen Z Trend

February 17, 2024 Andrew

GOESSEL, KS It’s the wave that’s sweeping the nation: foot-washing. Millennials, Gen Zers – you name it, they’re doing it. After a popular Super Bowl commercial last week, retailers were quick to capitalize on the […]

Posts pagination

« 1 2 3 4 … 21 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Mennonite Church Hires Coldplay to Help Spot the Sinners
    July 20, 2025
  • Mennonite Man’s Sexy Overalls Declared “Stumbling Block”
    July 11, 2022
  • Sean Penn Confesses He’s Really a Penner
    September 9, 2023
  • Pierre Poilievre to Reintroduce Carbon Tax Just So He Has Something to Scrap
    March 17, 2025
  • Mennonite Pastor Shortens Sermons to 90 Minutes for the Summer Months
    April 22, 2021

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved