STEINBACH, MB With temperatures soaring above 30 degrees centigrade this summer, the City of Steinbach has announced a revolutionary new plan for residents to beat the heat. The city announced Monday that all the local […]
NEW YORK, NY When the New York Stock Exchange ended trading on Monday, the price of schmaunt fat closed at a record high of $123.21 a barrel, smashing the previous record of just over $115. […]
STEINBACH, MB Proving once again that Steinbach truly is “worth the trip,” Unger Motors of Steinbach is offering a free 5 gallon bucket of schmaunt fat to anyone who test drives a used vehicle this weekend. […]
PLUM COULEE, MB Mennonites throughout southern Manitoba have been lining up outside local pharmacies to get their hands on a newly redesigned EpiPen that injects an emergency supply of schmaunt fat straight into the user’s […]
KITCHENER, ON Climate scientists in southern Ontario predict that, due to increasing temperatures, by the year 2030, there will be a global shortage of schmaunt fat. The white cream gravy has been a staple of […]
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