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schmaunt fat

Unger & Thirst

7 Liquids that Mennonites Just Can’t Resist

July 6, 2018 Andrew

Mennonites have always been landlubbers. I can’t count the number of times I’ve heard a fellow Menno complain about sushi. We’re prairie folk. We like flat fields of wheat and prefer to live nowhere near […]

Quizzes

What is your favourite Russian Mennonite food?

February 25, 2018 Andrew

Yesterday, we asked which Russian Mennonite foods you had tried. The top ten most common were: 1) Vereniki 2) Dill Pickles 3) Formavorscht 4) Cabbage Borscht 5) Roll Kuchen 6) Cold Cuts 7) Whipped Cream/Jell-O […]

Unger & Thirst

How Many of These Common Mennonite Foods Have You Tried?

February 24, 2018 Andrew

How many of these Russian Mennonite treats, many of which we stole from the Ukrainians and Poles, have you consumed? (I’m not knowledgable enough about Swiss Mennonite food to make a list of 50. If […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite CPAP Machine Provides Continuous Flow of Schmaunt Fat

January 10, 2018 Andrew

HERBERT, SK Cardiologists in the small town of Herbert, Saskatchewan are testing out a new CPAP machine that would provide Mennonites with a continuous flow of schmaunt fat while they sleep. Local man Dale Broesky […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Scores Big on ‘Wheel of Fortune’

October 21, 2017 Andrew

CULVER CITY, CA Mrs. Carolyn Berg, 63, from Blumenort, Manitoba scored big on ‘Wheel of Fortune’ this past week after all the puzzles had something to do with Mennonites. She took home more than $120,000, […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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