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oil

Unger Suspicion

Vinegar Feeling ‘Severely Neglected’ as Jason Kenney Spends All His Time on Oil

June 1, 2019 Andrew

EDMONTON, AB Representatives from the vinegar industry are feeling pretty darn neglected as Alberta Premier Jason Kenney seems to be spending all his time defending oil. “He’s just oil this and oil that. I get […]

Unger & Thirst

Schmaunt Fat Prices Soar to Record Highs

June 20, 2017 Andrew

NEW YORK, NY When the New York Stock Exchange ended trading on Monday, the price of schmaunt fat closed at a record high of $123.21 a barrel, smashing the previous record of just over $115. […]

Uncategorized

Albertans Gladly ‘Render Unto Notley What is Notley’s’

April 11, 2017 Andrew

EDMONTON, AB Three months after Alberta Premier Rachel Notley introduced a new carbon tax in the oil rich province, millions of Albertans have responded with unprecedented positivity that pundits have described as “remarkably Christlike.” “We’re seeing a […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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