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frugality

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites Flock to Get their Hands on $65 Elton John T-Shirts

October 5, 2019 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Mennonites were crowding the hallways at the Bell MTS Place last night to get their hands on some $65 Elton John T-Shirts. “Oba, yo! Oh, look, a hoodie for $125 and for just […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Attends Funerals Just for All the Free Food

September 29, 2019 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Mrs. Doerksen has a busy funeral schedule this week attending all the funerals of people with whom she had only marginal acquaintance. “It’s a good place to stock up on cheese curds and […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Waters Down Her Ketchup to Make it Last

September 22, 2019 Andrew

BLUMENHOF, MB Mrs. Plett decided to add three cups of water to her bottle of ketchup and “bring that stuff back to life.” The practice of watering down ketchup has strong roots in the Mennonite […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Couple Saves a Fortune by Sharing Dish at Local Restaurant

September 18, 2019 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Local couple, Bill and Anne Kliewer, have accumulated enough money to last the rest of their lives after sharing a 3 piece meal at the local Chicken Chef. “What’s 10.95 divided by two?” […]

Unger Suspicion

Manitoba Government Replaces All Winnipeg Emergency Rooms With This One Bungalow in Transcona

July 12, 2019 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB The provincial government recently announced an exciting new plan to shut down all Winnipeg emergency rooms and move them to this old “fixer-upper” they found in Transcona. “Let me tell you, this bungalow […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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