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alberta

Unger Suspicion

Cal-gary Man Insists He’s from ‘Calgree’

November 13, 2019 Andrew

CAL-GARY, AB Local man and faithful Mennonite church attendee Jeremy Goerzen, 41, has lived in the Whitehorn neighbourhood of Northeast Cal-gary his entire life, yet for some strange reason he still insists on calling the […]

The Daily Bonnet

Winkler Sees Surge in ‘West Reserve Alienation’ After Election Results

October 24, 2019 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Residents of the former Mennonite West Reserve (or Jantsied as it’s more commonly known) have become increasingly disenchanted with the state of politics at the present day. This feeling of alienation is so […]

Unger Suspicion

Former Manitobans Now Outnumber Albertans in Alberta

September 23, 2019 Andrew

CALGARY, AB A new report from the government of Alberta indicates that former Manitobans are the largest identifiable group in the province. “There are more ex-pat Manitobans than Alberta-born Albertans,” said premier Jason Kenney. “We’re […]

Unger & Thirst

Manitoba Couple Forgets to Bring “the Good Farmer Sausage” on Trip to Alberta

August 28, 2019 Andrew

TABER, AB The Doerksens of Altona disappointed a whole community of Alberta Mennonites this week after completely forgetting to bring the “good farmer sausage” with them on a recent trip. “We were in such a […]

Unger Suspicion

Vinegar Feeling ‘Severely Neglected’ as Jason Kenney Spends All His Time on Oil

June 1, 2019 Andrew

EDMONTON, AB Representatives from the vinegar industry are feeling pretty darn neglected as Alberta Premier Jason Kenney seems to be spending all his time defending oil. “He’s just oil this and oil that. I get […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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