Cal-gary Man Insists He’s from ‘Calgree’


Local man and faithful Mennonite church attendee Jeremy Goerzen, 41, has lived in the Whitehorn neighbourhood of Northeast Cal-gary his entire life, yet for some strange reason he still insists on calling the city “Calgree.”

“It’s Calgree, get it? Two syllables. Two. Not three!” fumed Goerzen. “Love it, or leave it. That’s just the way we say it around here, okay!”

Goerzen has been a big Calgree Flames fan and even had season tickets to the Calgree Stampeders for a while during the Doug Flutie years.

“There’s no extra emphasis on the ‘cal’ part,” explained Goerzen. “Diewel, when will people learn to say it right for once!”

Goerzen has petitioned the city to remove the second A from the spelling, which he believes is confusing people.

“That second A is superfluous,” said Goerzen. “It’s like the raisins in Oma’s plumi moos. Totally unnecessary.”

A few dozen people have come to his assistance, although others are saying it’s just his Plautdietsch accent that’s throwing things off.

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