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The Daily Bonnet

Canadian Mennonites Upset as their Team, the Germans, are Eliminated from the World Cup

December 4, 2022 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Thousands of Mennonite soccer fans across Canada were really upset this week after the team they were really rooting for, the Germans, were eliminated from the World Cup yet again. “Ugh, typical Germany, […]

Unger Suspicion

Metalheads Accidentally Attend Beth Moore Event

December 3, 2022 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB It was yet another mix-up in the maze of hallways and passageways leading to Winnipeg downtown arena this week, which had metalheads Peter and Darryl Plett show up at a Beth Moore conference […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Regrets Ordering Taco Bell Right Before Church

December 2, 2022 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Area man Jack Friesen had a real hankering for Taco Bell this past Sunday morning, but instantly regretted it the moment he sat down in church. “Yeah, well, it all tastes good going […]

Unger Suspicion

Taylor Swift Ticket Discovered at Thrift Store

December 1, 2022 Andrew

READING, PA After the demand for tickets was so high that it crashed the Ticketmaster site this week, Taylor Swift fans were left out of luck. That is, until one lucky soul in Reading, Pennsylvania […]

Unger Games

New Card Game ‘German Blitz’ Fails to Catch On

November 30, 2022 Andrew

BERLIN, GERMANY After visiting Pennsylvania last year, German inventor Andreas Fischer discovered a favourite new card game and decided to make a version of his own. Unfortunately for Fischer the game has not really caught […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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