Mennonites Inspire Tesla to Release ‘New Improved’ Cybertruck


After a disastrous launch that saw two windows shattered and a design that was universally mocked as looking like a cast-off from the 1980s, Telsa owner Elon Musk consulted with a Mr. Toews this week to ‘tweak’ the design a little bit.

“Well, I said to Mr. Musk, ‘I’ve got just the truck for you yet,'” said Mr. Toews, who owns a junk yard near Fresno. “This rust bucket is far sturdier and looks better than that thing you came up with.”

Musk was immediately taken with the new design and hired Toews on the spot.

“I know there’s not much ‘cyber’ in this new design, but we make up for that with a whole lot of rust,” said Musk. “I’m sure this model will be a big hit.”

Mennonites, who were initially reluctant with the old design, have lined up to purchase the new improved version.

“Dat truck looks just like the one I grew up with,” said local farmer Mr. Jansen. “Boy, I always thought this Mr. Musk was out of touch, but now I see he’s made a vehicle espashally for someone like me yet.”

The new truck uses absolutely no fossil fuels as the engine and gas tank rusted away decades ago.

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