Mennonites Caught Smuggling Dirty Rubber Boots Across the Border

WINDSOR, ON

A Canadian Mennonite family has been detained at the Windsor-Detroit border this afternoon after the Canadian border officer spotted Mr. Friesen’s dirty rubber boots and suspected their might be a problem.

“How long have you had those manure-caked rubber boots?” said the officer. “Oh, and those suspenders looks awfully suspicious, too.”

In recent days, Canadians have been accused of smuggling footwear back into the country using a wide variety of sneaky tactics.

“The dirtier they are, the more I get suspicious,” said the officer. “These Canadian Mennonites will do anything to get their hands on a pair of cheap American shit kickers.”

Mr. Friesen insisted he’d always had those boots, though the officer decided to take him in for questioning anyway.

“They tested them like crazy yet,” said Mr. Friesen. “I told them I also had a pair of tighty-whities they might want to have a look at, but they didn’t seem that interested in them.”

Since they had no conclusive evidence, Mr. Friesen was let go with a warning, though just moments later an entire minivan full of Driedgers from Leamington were arrested and fined for wearing Crocs that looked suspiciously new.

(photo credit: Jane Nearing/CC)

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