The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

economy

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Concerned About Her Stock After Markets Tumble

March 28, 2025 Andrew

ALTONA, MB Area woman Aganetha Barkman rushed home from the quilting bee this afternoon after hearing on the radio that stocks were crashing. “Not on my watch!” proclaimed Barkman, hopping into her CRV. “I remember […]

Unger the Influence

Canada Introduces New Food Allergy Warning Label

March 9, 2025 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON Just moments after ascending to the throne, new Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney announced an important new set of warning labels to be displayed on all food products in the country. “We want […]

Unger & Thirst

$80 Million Carton of Eggs Smashes Record in Sotheby’s Auction

February 7, 2025 Andrew

NEW YORK, NY A totally normal carton of eggs sold for a record $80 million plus buyer’s premium in a Sotheby’s auction this week, smashing the previous record of $4.50. “I’ve never seen anything like […]

Unger Suspicion

Patriotic Canadian to Disassemble All His Furniture and Replace the Screws with Robertsons

February 4, 2025 Andrew

KITCHENER, ON Area man Garth Eby, 39, has just begun a yearlong project to dissemble every stitch of furniture in his house and replace all the screws with Robertsons. “I’m starting with the kitchen cabinets, […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Pastor to Enact 25% Tithe on First Day in Office

November 26, 2024 Andrew

LINDEN, AB Pastor David, whose name was recently pulled from the hat this past week, has threatened to enact a whopping 25% tithe starting his first day in office this January. “No more of this […]

Posts pagination

1 2 … 7 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Ungerer Adds an Extra ‘Er’ to Become Ungererer
    September 8, 2023
  • Manitoba Beaches to Open This Weekend After Temperatures Soar to -15!
    February 13, 2019
  • Steinbach City Council Candidate Reveals Shocking DNA Test Results
    October 23, 2018
  • Mennonite Couple Notices “Chastity” Sign Just 20 Minutes Too Late
    May 13, 2022
  • Mannanites are Feeling Vary Blast This Time of Year Yet
    December 15, 2017

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved