Mennonite Seniors Destroy Team of Youngsters on Pickleball Court


The team of Peter Heppner, 78, and Lois Brandt, 81, totally destroyed some young novices on the pickleball court at the Seniors Centre this week.

“No one beats a Mennonite senior at pickleball,” said Heppner. “Who are these kids, kidding? They don’t stand a chance at knipsbrat or shuffleboard, either!”

There has been a surge of Mennonite interest in pickleball over the past couple years, due in part to the strict stance that local churches have taken against other sports like horseshoes and lawn bowling.

“We wanted our seniors to direct their energy in a more productive direction,” said Pastor Dave. “Plus, it’s no wonder Mennonites dominate a sport called pickleball.”

The Steinbach Pickleball Association is hosting a tournament this week. Prizes include a jar of Mrs. Driedger’s dills and ten pounds of zoat.

“Everyone’s open to come out and compete,” said Heppner. “But those young scamps better watch out! They’re on our turf now!”

(photo credit: Rob B/CC)

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