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tennis

Unger Games

Djokovic Retires from Tennis to Take on Trucking Job in Canada

January 23, 2022 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON After dominating the sport of tennis for the past two decades, Novak Djokovic plans to use his immense talents to single-handedly solve the supply chain problem in Canada. “Got my Class 1 license […]

Unger Games

Djokovic Teams Up With Oma Krahn for Mixed Doubles Tournament

January 18, 2022 Andrew

MELBOURNE, AUSTRALIA Just days after being booted out of Australia, deported tennis superstar Novak Djokovic has already selected a new partner for an upcoming mixed doubles tournament. “I met Oma Krahn in Hofnungschanzenhimmelsfeld, Manitoba while […]

Unger Games

Novak Djokovic Deported to Southern Manitoba

January 16, 2022 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Controversial tennis star Novak Djokovic was given a one-way ticket out of Australia this week and has selected a dairy farm south of Winkler as “the only place I really feel at home.” […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Seniors Destroy Team of Youngsters on Pickleball Court

September 26, 2019 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB The team of Peter Heppner, 78, and Lois Brandt, 81, totally destroyed some young novices on the pickleball court at the Seniors Centre this week. “No one beats a Mennonite senior at pickleball,” […]

The Daily Bonnet

New Regulations Force Female Crokinole Players to Wear Short Skirts

May 4, 2017 Andrew

KITCHENER, ON In an effort to draw viewers away from tennis, the International Crokinole Federation (ICF) has recently announced that it will now be requiring all ladies knipsbrat players to wear skirts “above the knee.” “If professional […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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