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Unger Games

Mennonite Tennis Fan Unaffected by Repetitive Head Turning

September 3, 2023 Andrew

NEW YORK, NY Andreas Siemens of Winkler, Manitoba was at the US Open this week where he became the very first fan to ever watch a full day of tennis without significant neck strain. “I’m […]

Unger Conviction

Lutheran Pastor Signs 1-Day Contract to Retire as a Mennonite

August 13, 2023 Andrew

FRIEDENSFELD, MB After a 15-year-career where he set nearly every record in the Evangelical Lutheran Church of Canada record book, Pastor David has shockingly decided to sign a 1-day contract to retire as a Mennonite. […]

Unger Games

Fans Shocked as PGA Tour Merges with Mennonite Cornhole League

June 7, 2023 Andrew

HENDERSON, NE The news sent shockwaves across the sporting world this afternoon, after it was announced that the PGA Tour would be merging with their longtime rival Mennonite Cornhole League. “It was a long hard […]

Unger Games

Jets Disgusted After Disgusting Performance Leads Coach to be Disgusted

April 30, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB After a disgustingly quick exit from the NHL playoff, the Winnipeg Jets players are absolutely disgusted to discover their own coach was disgusted with their disgusting performance. “I’m absolutely disgusted that he’d call […]

Unger Suspicion

New Olympic-size Swimming Pool Opens in Winnipeg

April 13, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB A regulation Olympic-size swimming pool, complete with diving board, and a 24/7 on-duty lifeguard has opened up in the middle of a busy street in Winnipeg this week. “We’re really excited about this […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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