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Unger Suspicion

Unger Suspicion

Local Man Becomes Mennonite Just for the Jokes

July 17, 2022 Andrew

TORONTO, ON Area man and budding comedian Darryl Harris, 41, has taken up membership at his local Mennonite church just so he can tell all the jokes without retribution. “I love the one about how […]

Unger Suspicion

Taco Bell Purchases John Coltrane Catalogue for $200 Million

July 13, 2022 Andrew

IRVINE, CA In an effort to attract a more sophisticated audience, fast food giant Taco Bell is in talks to purchase the music catalogues of jazz legends Bill Evans, Charles Mingus, and John Coltrane. “A […]

Unger Suspicion

Census Shows 96% of Canadian Men are Named Gord

July 1, 2022 Andrew

TORONTO, ON Statistics Canada has released the results of a brand new survey that shows that 95.7% of Canadian men sport the first name Gord. “Basically we went to the Yonge-Dundas Square and starting yelling […]

Unger Suspicion

Babylon Bee Accidentally Mocks Rich White Cis Hetero Man

June 27, 2022 Andrew

JUPITER, FL After garnering a substantial following by mocking people who are different than them, the staff at fundamentalist Christian satire site Babylon Bee accidentally poked fun a rich white cisgender heterosexual male this week. […]

Unger Suspicion

“Oops, My Bad,” Say Democrats Who Forgot to Codify Roe v. Wade for Almost 50 Years

June 26, 2022 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC Crocodile tears were flowing at Democratic Party headquarters this week, as the men in charge of the party, realized that, yet again, they’d been paying lip service to an idea without doing anything […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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