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Unger Suspicion

Unger Suspicion

Canada and Denmark Reach Settlement Over Disputed Nikolaj Ehlers

June 21, 2022 Andrew

COPENHAGEN, DENMARK Years of feuding appears to be over after the governments of Canada and Denmark have agreed to stop putting flags on Winnipeg Jets superstar Nikolaj Ehlers and instead draw a line down the […]

Unger Suspicion

Biblical Fiery Furnace Located in Southern Manitoba

June 20, 2022 Andrew

KLEEFELD, MB After years of searching, local archeologists have discovered the fiery furnace mentioned in the Book of Daniel. It turns out if was just outside Kleefeld, Manitoba this whole time. “We’ve searched all over […]

Unger Suspicion

Summer Festival Offers Steinbachers an Entire Weekend without Obnoxious Street Racers

June 17, 2022 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Every year, the City of Steinbach shuts down Main Street for a festival known as Summer in the City, which features food trucks, multi-cultural events, live music, and a carnival, but for many […]

Unger Suspicion

‘Reach for the Top’ Contestant Buzzes in 40 Years Too Late

June 8, 2022 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Audiences of the fast-paced high school quiz show ‘Reach for the Top’ have been waiting well over 40 years for contestant Earl Unger to buzz in with the correct answer to the question, […]

Unger Suspicion

Jury Finds Johnny Depp Guilty of Having Better Lawyers

June 1, 2022 Andrew

FAIRFAX COUNTY, VA Seven jurors have found actor Johnny Depp guilty of having, “like, way better lawyers than Amber Heard.” In a historic decision, the jury ruled that there was absolutely no evidence that “Amber […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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