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Articles by Andrew

Unger Suspicion

Rare Patch of Smooth Road Discovered in Winnipeg

March 28, 2018 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Mr. Thiessen of North Kildonan was utterly shocked to discover a short patch of completely smooth road in Winnipeg during a visit to the Linden Woods neighbourhood this weekend. “What the hell is […]

Unger Conviction

Dating Couple Finds Convenient Loophole in Purity Pledge

March 27, 2018 Andrew

HARRISONBURG, VA College juniors, Matt Lewis and Bethany Lehman, are among thousands of American young people to sign pledges committing themselves to “remain pure until marriage.” Luckily for the newly dating couple, however, they were able to […]

Unger Conviction

Last Church in Town Finally Drops ‘Cumbersome Mennonite Label’

March 26, 2018 Andrew

KLEINFELD, SK In the 1920s, the small town of Kleinfeld had more than a dozen Mennonite churches of various shapes and sizes. In 2018, all the churches are still around, though over the years most of […]

Unger & Thirst

Adorable Mennonite Child Becomes Millionaire Selling Chocolates to Old People

March 25, 2018 Andrew

SOUTH BLUMENORT, MB 6-year-old Anna Berg of South Blumenort has become the region’s latest millionaire after selling a record number of chocolate-covered almonds to area seniors. While Mennonites have the reputation for being rather frugal, […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Snags Best License Plate Ever! (This is real!)

March 24, 2018 Andrew

SANFORD, MB It isn’t often that the Daily Bonnet reports on something real, but here is a rare exception that was too good to pass up. Earlier today (March 2018) Jennifer Wiebe of Sanford, Manitoba […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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