Maxime Bernier Attracts Just Barely Enough Supporters to Get Himself Arrested


People’s Party leader Maxime Bernier was just beginning his cross-Manitoba ‘Freedom’ tour, when he was arrested in St. Pierre for attracting a massive crowd of six enthusiastic supporters, plus the guy who does the sound and the guy who drives him around.

“It’s great to be loved,” said Bernier, waving to the adoring crowd a half dozen folks who had nothing better to do. “It’s nice to finally be a winner after losing the leadership race, my spot in the House of Commons, and every single seat we ran for in the last election.”

Bernier was soon reporting that it was the largest crowd in Canadian political history.

“Just look at the crowd! Look at them!” yelled Bernier, who was heard muttering ‘muh freedoms, muh freedoms’ as he was hauled into the police cruiser. “These five or so southern Manitobans sure didn’t look at me like this when I got the Wheat Board axed, let me tell you.”

After the incident, his five supporters have had a radical change of heart regarding law and order.

“Ummm, yeah, abolish the police? Sounds good to me,” said one of the five or six supporters. “And, yeah, maybe we can ease up a bit on that tough on crime stance.”

In response to the event the Manitoba government will now be requiring all people entering the province to self-isolate from Maxime Bernier for a minimum of two weeks.

(photo credit:Parti conservateur du Québec/CC)

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