“No, thanks!” Don Plett Rejects Ryan Reynolds’ Offer to Purchase Ottawa Senators


Rumours have swirled for weeks that Hollywood actor Ryan Reynolds is attempting to buy up all the Ottawa senators, but at least one member of the upper house objects to the plan.

“I’m not for sale,” said Senate Opposition Leader and Manitoba senator Don Plett. “And not even the guy from Deadpool can persuade me otherwise.”

Of greatest concern for Plett was the thought that Reynolds might move all the Ottawa senators to southern California or something.

“Thanks, but no thanks,” said Plett. “I’m not much of a fan of all that Hollywood glitz and glamour. Landmark, Manitoba is more than flashy enough for me.”

The price to purchase the Ottawa senators is estimated to be north of $1 billion, not including the cost of purchasing all that Voltaren Emulgel.

“I think we’re a little out of Mr. Reynolds’ price range,” said Plett. “Especially Mennonite senators like Peter Harder and myself. We don’t agree on much, but we both agree that it’s going to take a lot more than Ryan Reynolds to get us to move.”

In a press release this afternoon, Reynolds clarified that he was actually looking to buy the Ottawa senators’ farm team the House of Commons.

(photo credit: dtstuff9/cc)

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