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Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Loves His New Mobile Office

July 18, 2023 Andrew

LEAMINGTON, ON Local tomato grower Jake Martens of Leamington is really excited about his new mobile office that he picked up at the Ford dealership early this week. “I was tired of holding all my […]

The Daily Bonnet

Concerning New Mennonite Workplace Trend: Quiet Quilting

April 2, 2023 Andrew

NIAGARA-ON-THE-LAKE, ON It’s called “Quiet Quilting” and it’s a concerning new workplace trend, as increasing numbers of Mennonites in offices and shops across the country are discreetly stitching away at their quilts during the workday. […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Man Wears Steel Toe Boots to Church

December 19, 2022 Andrew

KLEEFELD, MB In an abundance of caution, Mr. Plett has taken to wearing his steel toe boots everywhere he goes, including church. “I’m a Mennonite, so of course I don’t care about safety recommendations,” said […]

Unger Suspicion

Area Man to Corner You at the Water Cooler Tomorrow Morning and Tell You All About the Latest Joe Rogan Podcast

October 17, 2022 Andrew

CALGARY, AB Area man Jeremy Goertzen is really pumped about something he heard on Joe Rogan recently and is now planning to find you at the water cooler tomorrow morning and tell you all about […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Sunday School Class to Discuss Ethics of Doing ‘Cash Jobs’

August 6, 2022 Andrew

GRUNTHAL, MB The Eastside Grunthal MCB church will be discussing the ethics of dudes doing jobs for cash in the Sunday morning adult Sunday school class. “Okay, so Garth over there offered to give me […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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