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Unger Games

Djokovic Retires from Tennis to Take on Trucking Job in Canada

January 23, 2022 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON After dominating the sport of tennis for the past two decades, Novak Djokovic plans to use his immense talents to single-handedly solve the supply chain problem in Canada. “Got my Class 1 license […]

Unger Suspicion

Mennonites Inspire Tesla to Release ‘New Improved’ Cybertruck

November 28, 2019 Andrew

PALO ALTO, CA After a disastrous launch that saw two windows shattered and a design that was universally mocked as looking like a cast-off from the 1980s, Telsa owner Elon Musk consulted with a Mr. […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Stunt Driver Performs Ten U-Turns in a Row

October 12, 2019 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB A local man who calls himself “Steinbach’s most badass stunt driver,” performed more than a dozen successful U-turns on Main Street on Tuesday night in his Ford pick-up. “Doing U-turn is how I […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man with Pickup Truck Constantly Asked to Help Move

May 25, 2019 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Local pickup truck owner Keith Dueck, 33, is going to be pretty busy this summer moving all his friends to their new homes. “I’m pretty booked up,” said Dueck. “I guess that’s what […]

The Daily Bonnet

7 Things Mennonites Are Allowed to Waste Money On

June 30, 2018 Andrew

When it comes to spending, Mennonites are a frugal bunch. Despite the fact many Mennonites have done well for themselves economically, they’re not the type to flaunt their wealth. You won’t see a Mennonite driving […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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