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Unger Suspicion

Smoke Detector Battery Conveniently Programmed to Expire and Chirp Loudly at 2 in the Morning

December 5, 2023 Andrew

MITCHELL, MB After five years of hard work keeping the family safe, a 9V battery in the Loewen home over in Mitchell is set to conveniently expire and chirp incessantly starting at about 2 this […]

The Daily Bonnet

“Oba, it’s Getting Dark, Henry”: Manitoba Couple Always in Bed by 4:30 this Time of Year

December 28, 2020 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Retired couple Henry and Barb Thiessen of North Kildonan are usually hitting the hay a little after 4 pm these days or just as soon as it gets dark. “We had a couple […]

Unger Suspicion

Local Woman Turns Her Clock Back to 2019

November 1, 2020 Andrew

WATERLOO, ON Rather than going back just one hour, one local woman decided to move her clock back a whole year to a time before the complete dumpster fire that was 2020. “I figured, hey, […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Agrees to Annual Meddachschlop for Her Henry’s Birthday

October 18, 2019 Andrew

CHORTITZ, SK Mrs. Funk, 61, had nearly forgotten about her promise for their annual meddachschlop this afternoon, until her Henry reminded her it was his birthday. “Ah, okay, yes, Henry, is it that time of […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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