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schmaunt fat

Unger & Thirst

New Mennonite EpiPen Injects Emergency Supply of Schmaunt Fat

October 27, 2016 Andrew

PLUM COULEE, MB Mennonites throughout southern Manitoba have been lining up outside local pharmacies to get their hands on a newly redesigned EpiPen that injects an emergency supply of schmaunt fat straight into the user’s […]

Unger & Thirst

Climate Scientists Predict Global Shortage of Schmaunt Fat

May 16, 2016 Andrew

KITCHENER, ON Climate scientists in southern Ontario predict that, due to increasing temperatures, by the year 2030, there will be a global shortage of schmaunt fat. The white cream gravy has been a staple of […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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