KENORA, ON A minor hockey team in Kenora is in tears tonight after the sound guy at the arena forgot to play “We Will Rock You” as the team entered the ice. The team subsequently […]
LONDON, UK A popular new biopic, Blumenort Rhapsody, reveals a side of Freddie Mercury’s life that has remained untold until now. From 1978-1982, the Queen singer secretly lived among the Mennonites of southern Manitoba. “At the […]
MIAMI, FL After a dreadful half-time performance by crap-band Maroon 5 at Super Bowl LIII, the National Football League has announced that “from now on, the only entertainment you’re gonna get is a few old […]
MOUNTAIN LAKE, MN As Mennonite men age, many of them experience a decreased ability to hold a hymnal upright during the service. Doctors in Mountain Lake say Hymnal Dysfunction affects one in three men over […]
TORONTO, ON Executives at the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation have decided to ban the popular Plautdietsch holiday tune ‘Frü, Daut es Kold Büte’, after thousands of Canadians complained they didn’t know what the heck the words […]
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